Sounds Fake But Okay

Ep 212: We're Back!

April 17, 2022 Sounds Fake But Okay
Sounds Fake But Okay
Ep 212: We're Back!
Show Notes Transcript

Hey what's up hello! We're back after our long hiatus! We have so much to tell you about what's been going on :)

(Apologies for Kayla's audio quality, we're a bit rusty)

Episode Transcript:


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SARAH: Hey what’s up hello! Welcome to Sounds Fake but Okay a podcast where an aroace girl, I’m Sarah that’s me.

KAYLA: … And a bi demisexual girl, that’s me, Kayla 

SARAH: talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else we just don’t understand.

KAYLA: On today’s episode, we’re back! 

SARAH: (quietly) yay! 


SARAH: sounds fake. Wait no, that was the wrong intonation. 


SARAH AND KAYLA: Sounds fake, but okay 

SARAH: (laughing) I’m going to leave that in. 

KAYLA: I think you should. 

SARAH: It’s been a while. 

KAYLA: We’re rusty. 

(Intro music)

SARAH: Welcome back to the pod! 

KAYLA: m’ora– what was it? 

SARAH: It was m’oratorium. 

KAYLA: M’oratorium

SARAH: Kayla, would you like to tell the people?

KAYLA: Alexa, play “Taps”. 

SARAH: The first bit of news on this return to the pod? 

(singing “Taps”)

KAYLA: sadly the “m’” this is its final hoorah 

SARAH: This is its final hoorah. We’re putting an indefinite m’oratorium on the “m’”

KAYLA: Yes. Just feels like the right time, you know? 

SARAH: Yeah. It had its heyday and that’s behind us now. 

KAYLA: (laughing) Yeah I’m tired of it because I can’t think of any more

SARAH: She ran out of words that start with “M”. 

KAYLA: I ran out of… I did the whole “M” section of the dictionary and it’s over now, we did them all. Every word.

SARAH: Every word, every language, all of them. 


SARAH: Okay! Hey, Kayla, what are we talking about this week? 

KAYLA: This week, we’re talking about how – 

SARAH: It’s kind of a big housekeeping episode

KAYLA: Yeah, yeah. That’s pretty much it. Just to say…

SARAH: We’re easing in

KAYLA: Yes, we’re a bit rusty, as you may have noticed. So yeah, we’re just – 

SARAH: The people can’t see that, this is an audio medium 

KAYLA: Yeah, but it’s bothering me. We’re obviously a little rusty. We’ve been gone for 3? 4? 

SARAH: Three and some change? 


SARAH: Months, to be clear


KAYLA: Days? Hours? 

SARAH: That’s the unit 

KAYLA: Hours? We’ve been gone for at least three. 

SARAH: At least three

KAYLA: We’ve been gone for at least three. So yeah. We’re just saying hi.

SARAH: And we’re back!

KAYLA: We did it! We’re back

SARAH: Thank you for your patience. I know we were supposed to be back last week, but we had some poorly timed personal life things happening, but we’re back this week with kind of an in-betweener episode, and then next week we’ll be back with a regular, old pod, and we’re here! Hey, hey, hey! I think our first piece of information, to keep this podcast, to keep this house, is we wrote a book!


SARAH: That was a big part of the reason we took our hiatus, was to finish our book, and we did that.

KAYLA: We did that. A big shock is that we did do a lot of procrastinating. (laughter) We had over a full year, I think, since we signed our contract and properly were like it’s time to write a book until our manuscript was due. There was a lot of time in there where writing was not happening.

SARAH: But hey. We submitted our transcript. Our publisher has read our transcript. 

KAYLA: manuscript. 

SARAH: (laughing) Manuscript

KAYLA: mhm. 

SARAH: We have submitted our manuscript, our publisher has read our manuscript

KAYLA: He said “good job!”

SARAH: And he said “good job!” And guess what, kids. 


KAYLA: What? 

SARAH: I was waiting for Kayla to say what and she didn’t say anything. 

KAYLA: What? What? 

SARAH: We have a tentative publication date. 

KAYLA: Yes. 

SARAH: This is a pod exclusive, never before heard, never before seen

KAYLA: Never

SARAH: Never before shared, except for in our publisher’s email to us.

KAYLA: And probably also to the people I know in my personal life. 

SARAH: I think we told Cody. I think we told Ace Dad.


KAYLA: Well, yeah, because Ace Dad is like our book twin.

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: Because their book comes a month after our book with the same publisher. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: Anyway, tentatively our book, title redacted, is coming to you February of 2023. 

SARAH: Yes, indeed. That’s not totally set in stone yet, subject to change, terms and conditions apply, but that’s what we’re looking at, and that’s exciting. And for those of you who are like “Wait, what are you talking about?”


 We have written a book, which is about how you can apply the aspec lens to all different aspects of your life in the least self-helpy way possible. And we hope that you’ll like it, because we worked hard on it, and it’s going to be good. We won’t tell you the title yet because we’re sneaky, but you’ll find that out eventually. 

KAYLA: And also, it might not be set in stone either, so.

SARAH: Well, no one told us no yet. 

KAYLA: That’s the thing is, I think, with a lot of this book. We’re like “Okay we did this, and no one said no, so like?” 

SARAH: Can we bind it? 

KAYLA: Did we do a good job? 

SARAH: Is this allowed? 

KAYLA: Is this allowed? I have never written a book before, so I don’t know how this works.

SARAH: Yeah, so that’s our book stuff. More information will come once we can officially announce the title, once we have set the date in stone, once we have a cover. We’re very excited for when we get a cover. We don’t have one yet. 

KAYLA: We don’t have one yet, but me and Sarah are notoriously picky when it comes to design things, so I feel incredibly bad for whoever – 

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: – is supposed to be working with us. I’ve been told, I have a friend who used to do PR for a book publisher before, and I’ve been told usually authors do not have much say in book covers, so that better not be the truth.

SARAH: But, I mean, our publisher did ask us for our thoughts. 

KAYLA: Well, yes

SARAH: And we sent way too many

KAYLA: We sent a lot of cover inspirations. 

SARAH: Yes. 

KAYLA: So yeah, one of these days we’ll do a fun, funky little title and then later a cover reveal. I’m very excited for that. We’re publishing with Jessica Kingsley Publishers, who is snatching up just every ace person alive, it seems like. 

SARAH: Infinity gauntlet of aspec activists.

KAYLA: So yeah, there’s a lot of people doing books in the next couple years, which is exciting! 

SARAH: So cool! We love aspec projects, and books, and things that other people can read, and be exposed to shit, and yay!

KAYLA: (laughing) So true. 

SARAH: Next, patreon stuff. 

KAYLA: Money. 

SARAH: If you’re not a patron, don’t tune out yet. 

KAYLA: Yep. If you’re not a patron, do one. 

SARAH: Mm, that was a good sentence. We’re back, so if you revoked your patronage during the hiatus and you would like to renew it, now is the time. At the end of this podcast when we do the patrons, we are going to read all of the patrons $5 and up. Please listen for your name, and if you expect to hear it and you don’t, you may want to check to see if your payment declined. We went through all of our patron list and basically cleaned it out, and there are some people who didn’t actively cancel but were taken off the list because they haven’t been giving us money. So, just so you know. Also, as we mentioned before the hiatus, our patreon money from during the hiatus, we let our patrons vote for what charities we would be giving that money away to, since we wouldn’t be making content, and we wouldn’t be using it. So, drumroll please!

(drumroll sound) 

SARAH: We gave $600 to the Trevor Project, $500 to the Transgender Law Center, and $500 to Direct Relief Ukraine, so yay!

KAYLA: Thank you to our patrons who stuck around because 90% of your money went to charity. It’s very cool. 

SARAH: Mhm. And the other 10% went to upkeep, not to like our pockets. 

KAYLA: Yeah, went to like us having a website and shit. Reminder of patreon things. The vast majority of our money right now goes toward getting our episodes transcribed. Which, there might be a lull in new transcripts coming up, just so you know. We’re transitioning between transcribers and stuff, and it’s harder than you think to find people to transcribe. 

SARAH: Well, and also because you need people who ideally know one or two things about our topics, so that they’re not like “wait what is this?” 

KAYLA: Yeah, ideally. So yeah, the vast majority of the money goes to that, some of it goes to keeping our website up, and we have to pay to put our episodes online and stuff like that. Yeah, and there’s some little perks like getting your name read in the episode, or getting to request – more like demand a topic, because anyone can request a topic, but a topic we have to do within reason. Little stickers, things like that. I mean, they’re not the most amazing perks, it’s more the knowledge that you’re helping an independent podcast be successful and online, so. 


SARAH: Yes, indeed. Also, that reminds me – this wasn’t on our schedule for today – , but we have a couple new merch products, don’t we? 

KAYLA: We do!

SARAH: Tell us more.

KAYLA: We have a little bucket hat. 

SARAH: Perfect. 

KAYLA: and a little patch, and they both have the design that’s on our logo with the flags that are crossed

SARAH: The crossed flags, the aro and ace flags. 

KAYLA: Yeah, so fun little things for your summer times. So, if you want any merch, 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: you can get fun little things. 

SARAH: Boy, howdy. Our other kind of logistical thing that we wanted to let you know about is– guys did you miss the planes? I don’t know if you can hear that, but I haven’t quite figured out how much the new mics pick up the planes that go by, but just so you know. 

KAYLA: I’m not used to having – I have planes and. Well I’ve always had trains, but now I have a new train. 

SARAH: Planes, and trains, and automobiles

KAYLA:Yeah, I’m not used to having these planes near me, so who’s to say what’s going to happen? 

SARAH: Hee hee hee. Our schedule, we will still be posting weekly from this point on, but we’re going to have more of a schedule. We’re going to be running little bit more on seasons than in the past because our first – what? fucking 200 episodes were just one large season. 

KAYLA: Yeah, and something that’s shocking, is that sometimes when you do something for four years straight with basically no breaks, is that your mental health is really bad. And you don’t realize it’s bad until you stop, and you’re like “why am I so much happier now?” and then you’re like “Hm. Interesting. For now”

SARAH: Hm. Interesting. So, from this point forward, we’re going to do a summer break and a winter break– oh this is North American. Well, I guess it doesn’t matter, because whatever. 


SARAH: Point being we’re going to have two breaks. They might not be exactly the same from year to year, but we’ll have one around Christmastime and one mid-year. And we will let you know before that happens when it’s going to be. Just so you know, we will have a little bit of a break, you will have a little bit of a break from hearing our funky voices in your ears. And hopefully we won’t get burnt out of each other. 

KAYLA: I don’t think I was ever burnt out of you.

SARAH: Oh, I meant us and the listeners. 

SARAH AND KAYLA: the listeners. 

KAYLA: Yes, that’s true. That’s true. We have to keep up our healthy parasocial relationship that we all have together.

SARAH: Exactly, exactly. Another thing, kind of like the last – 

KAYLA: Tell me more. 

SARAH: … is that 

KAYLA: Tell me everything. 

SARAH: I was going to say, not even the last logistical thing. We have so much to catch you up on, guys. 

KAYLA: We have so much to tell you. 

SARAH: All right, folks. Kayla, would you like to tell us, tell the people, about the black aspecs episode we are doing soon-ish? 

KAYLA: Yeah. I think we mentioned this online, but maybe not in episode. I don’t really remember, it’s been 3 or 4. 

SARAH: It’s been 84 years. 

KAYLA: It’s been 84 years, but yeah. We are currently working on putting out episode/slash episodes, depending on how many folks we can round up, but episodes featuring the experiences of black aspecs, so we’re working on that with some lovely people. We don’t have a definite time of when that will come out because it’s still in the works, but look forward to that. And if you’re a blask aspec person, and you’re interested in sharing your experience in one of the episodes, hit us up. Let us know. We’re thinking if people like it, and it goes well, and, I don’t know, if everyone’s down for it, it might turn into a series of doing other episodes with other underrepresented aspec groups. We’re thinking it’s going to be less of an interview and more like people talking without us. 

SARAH: We want to give those people the mic, so.

KAYLA: Yeah, we’re trying to figure out basically, it’ll be a different format than our regular episodes. We’re thinking of making a series episodes with that same format, but different people, if that makes sense. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: Yeah, anyway, that’s far down the road. What’s near is the Black Aspecs Experience Episode. So look out for that, and if you’re interested in being part of it, let us know. 

SARAH: Yes, indeed. Next point on our schedule is how have you been? 

KAYLA: I thought there was one more. 

SARAH: There’s one that’s going at the end. Don’t question me.

KAYLA: Okay. Sarah wrote down a little list, and I can’t see it, so.



SARAH: No, she can’t. How have you been, listeners? Now is your time to answer. I’ll give you a moment. 


KAYLA: Wow, that’s really cool.

SARAH: Or that’s really bad, and I’m sorry that happened. 

KAYLA: I’m sorry that happened. 


SARAH: Wow, really? 


KAYLA: Oh my god, that’s so– I don’t even know what I would’ve done in that scenario. 

SARAH: That’s frankly outrageous. 

KAYLA: I’m punching air right now. 

SARAH: Thank you for sharing, everyone. If you didn’t share, I hope you enjoyed the nice little silences.

KAYLA: (laughing) Just a little silent time. Maybe that’s what we should add in each episode. Just like, a moment of silence, not necessarily in remembrance of anything. 

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: But just for silence. 

SARAH: Just turn your brain off for a little while if you can.

KAYLA: Yeah, impossible. 

SARAH: I’m glad/sad to hear about those advancements and events in your lives. Remember how me and Kayla said it was going to be weird that we both had upcoming life changes while we were on hiatus? They happened. 

KAYLA: It’s true. We’ve done them.

SARAH: Kayla, where do you live? 

KAYLA: I no longer live in Louisiana, and I now live in Boston, but technically right now, I live in Chelsea, which is across the river from Boston. If I look out my window, I can see Boston from here, from across the river. 

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: But right now, I live in a hotel, and so do you. We live in a hotel, and so do you. 

SARAH: (laughing) And so do you. I thought you were saying that I live in a hotel. Like, me personally. And I was like “no, I don’t”. 

KAYLA:  Yeah, well, that’s what you think. 

SARAH: Oh no

KAYLA: Yeah, I’ve wanted to move to Boston for… ever since I moved to Louisiana, and –

SARAH: Sorry, Louisiana. 

KAYLA: Yeah, sorry Louisiana. It– we’ll get back to it. Dean’s work basically relocated us here. 

SARAH: We need to get you a new P.O. box. 

KAYLA: I know, yes. That is a good piece of– That’s true. 

SARAH: Don’t send anything to Kayla’s P.O. box right now.

KAYLA: Yeah, Sarah currently has a P.O. box, I don’t. If you look on the website, it says P.O box TBD, but don’t send anything to me right now because I don’t have anywhere to send it to. Right now, I’m living in a hotel, which is bad, and it sucks. But –

SARAH: You’ve done it before. 

KAYLA: I’ve done it before, and this one is nicer, but I still hate it because there are two humans and two cats living in one single room, and yeah. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: But in May, we will move to a place, and then in September, we’ll move into another place. 

SARAH: (laughing) Yay!

KAYLA: So that’s fun. And technically, we’ll be living in Cambridge,and not Boston, so I guess I’m never really living in Boston. I probably shouldn’t be saying this. I don’t want people to know where I am. 

SARAH: A lot of people live in Boston. 

KAYLA: That’s true.

SARAH: In the Boston area. 

KAYLA: That’s true. I guess like six or seven or eight people on discord live in the Boston area, and I hope I find them. I would like to collect them all. 

SARAH: I’ve never been to Boston. 

KAYLA: Really? 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: I’ve only been once, before now. We didn’t even 

SARAH: I was going to say now you’re there. 

KAYLA: Now I’m there. But we tried to come out and visit beforehand, but then our flight got canceled, and we couldn’t come. So yeah, we never came here before we moved here. Except for when we came here years ago. 

SARAH: Exciting. 

KAYLA: Anyway, I live here now. 

SARAH: I have a new job. 

KAYLA: Yeah. 

SARAH: Yeah. I got a new job. It’s a different job. 

KAYLA: You did it! You manifested it. All right! 

SARAH: (laughs) It only took so fucking long. 

KAYLA: But you did it this time. 

SARAH: I have a new job, and it’s going well. 

KAYLA: This lady. 

SARAH: I mean, is there any other information? I don’t think so. 

KAYLA: Hm, can I think of other things that have happened? My D&D campaign that I was playing for two and a half years ended, and it was very emotional. And there was a lot of crying. 

SARAH: Mhm. Don’t do that. 

KAYLA: But now we’ve started a new one, and it’s fun. 


KAYLA: So, that’s exciting. 

SARAH: You going to tell people where they can find it? 

KAYLA: Yeah, now it’s – it used to be a podcast, but it was too much upkeep, and the backend was too much – so now it’s a livestream every other Monday on the YouTubes. You search “Into the Gridge,” that’s the name of it, and you can see my funky little face. Audio and video. 

SARAH: Wow. 

KAYLA: The next one is actually, if you’re listening to this the day it comes out, is tomorrow. 

SARAH: Wow. 

KAYLA: A good little time. 


KAYLA: It’s a good time to hop on, because we’ve only done one episode. And not much happens, so you can just jump right on.


SARAH: Jump right in. Also, because Kayla is in Boston, we’re back to a three hour time difference between me and Kayla. 

KAYLA: We’re currently recording during the day on Friday because neither of us had work stuff going on, but– 

SARAH: Well, normally.. I sort of don’t have work today, but I sort of do, but most days I will be in the office. Not most days, all of the days. So, good fucking luck to us. 

KAYLA: Yeah, we’re going to have to go back to what? Like, our 11 PM. 

(laughing)  What if you just record in your office? Is that allowed? 

SARAH: Mm. Might be complicated. Anyway, that’s not a problem for our listeners. 

KAYLA: Well, maybe it is. 

SARAH: The next update is that aspec identities are still valid and real. Just like before.

KAYLA: Even four months later, that’s crazy. 

SARAH: (laughing) Even four months later.

KAYLA: And aspecs continue to not owe money, and it seems as though that ideology is spreading. 

SARAH: It’s spreading. 

KAYLA: Exciting. 

SARAH: Good. 

Kayla: That it’ s– Sarah’s movement is really catching on. 

SARAH: You doubted me. 

KAYLA: I did, but to be fair, you’ve doubted me before. 

SARAH: But you continuously doubted me.  

KAYLA: Okay, yeah. 

SARAH: All right. 


KAYLA: Can I share a funny thing? I don’t even know if I told you about this. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: At my old job, not the one I’ve been working at for the past year, but my old one, which was stinky. I did a campus tour video of our school, the University of Michigan, and it does well in the Youtube algorithm for some reason. Like, when you search up “University of Michigan campus tour”, it’s the first one. And we were looking at it at my current work for some reason the other day, and we were looking at the comments, and someone was like “Is that Kayla from Sounds Fake but Okay?” (laughter) So I’m famous. 

SARAH: Fame and fortune. 

KAYLA: I think everyone should go to the comments section of that video and say “Hi Kayla”

SARAH: Doing it right now. 

KAYLA: Good. 

SARAH: All right, we’re getting to the end, but don’t leave yet, okay? Because there’s still important information. 

KAYLA: I’m trying to think if there’s any other updates. 

SARAH: No, you’re taking too long. 

SARAH: Poll. The poll for this week is.. I don’t know. But what you do need to know is our polls were previously on twitter. Our polls are now going to move to Instagram stories. 

KAYLA: Yes. 

SARAH: For open-ended polls, you’ll be able to type a little thing in the question box and then we’ll be able to share some of the replies, but they’re only up for 24 hours.

KAYLA: That’s true, but I’m going to – 

SARAH: Should we make a thing where it just stays? 

KAYLA: Yes. It’s going to be a little highlight on our Instagram, so. You won’t be able to answer it after 24 hours, but you’ll still be able to see them.

SARAH: Maybe we should not post it until like Monday. 

KAYLA: That’s a good idea, we can do that. 

SARAH: Brainstorming live on the podcast.  

KAYLA: Live on the pod, yeah. Look out for polls on the Monday after the episodes are posted. That’s a good idea. 

SARAH: @soundsfakepod 

KAYLA: @soundsfakepod on Instagram, and on TikTok, and on Twitter

SARAH: Mhm. 


KAYLA: And on gmail, and on patreon, and on discord, and…

SARAH: I think that’s it. 

KAYLA: That’s it. Anyway, you should follow us on TikTok.

SARAH: You know what I remembered the other day?


SARAH: Do you remember Kik? 

KAYLA: I never used Kik. 

SARAH: I just remembered that it existed. Anyway, 

KAYLA: It did. And it was a scary time from what I’ve heard.

SARAH: Do we have a poll? 

KAYLA: I think we should ask what everyone else has been doing.

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: I know we already asked, and they already said verbally, and we listened very good. 

SARAH: We heard everything. 

KAYLA: We heard everything, but they should type it too, I think. 

SARAH: Yeah. I’m not an auditory learner, I’m a visual learner, so that will help me. 

KAYLA: Same. I think I am too, so. 

SARAH: Shit just goes right in my ear and then right on out. It does not stay there. 

KAYLA: No, I know. 


KAYLA: I know. 

SARAH: Thanks. 

KAYLA: So, yeah. Tell us what you’ve been doing since, I guess, the beginning of the year, really.

SARAH: Tell us about the exciting things in your life, or maybe not so exciting, maybe you ate a donut, and you know what? Fucking good for you. 

KAYLA: You know what, to be honest, I haven’t eaten a donut since the hiatus, and that is upsetting. 

SARAH: I have donuts on the mind because of my beef. So let’s use this transition. 


SARAH: Kayla, what is your beef and juice this week? I’m going first. 



KAYLA: That’s fine, I’ll just leave. 

SARAH: My beef is that my car is a donut. 

KAYLA: Mm, that’s true. 

SARAH: And by that, I mean I got a flat tire, and I have a spare tire on my car like a little donut, and I had to drive to and from work two days with my little donut. And I was like “what if something happens?” It was so brave and strong. 

KAYLA: Did you immediately cry when you realized you had a flat? Because I – 

SARAH: I didn’t cry at all. 

KAYLA: That is shocking to me. Well, maybe not about you. I guess, I don’t know. 

SARAH: I was surprisingly calm. 

KAYLA: If I got a flat, I would immediately sob. (laughs) 

SARAH: Let me tell you what happened. 

KAYLA: I would like you to paint a full picture of what happened. 

SARAH: Yeah, picture this. You’re Sarah. You’re driving a car. (laughs) Your gas is low, but not so low as for the gas light to come on yet, but you’re like “you know what? I’m going to be proactive. I’m going to go to the gas station on the way home from work today.” So, you get off of the highway and exit early, so that you don’t overshoot the gas station. As you’re getting off the highway, you don’t even see it coming, but you run over something and it makes a loud noise and you say “that’s not tasty.” And so you’re getting off the highway and then you’re on the exit and your car is like “Low tire pressure” and you’re like “that’s not good.” And then you accidentally turn the wrong way, so you go the wrong way, and then you’re like “Oh no,” and then you got to turn and go around. You got to go a different way. 

KAYLA: How long did you drive with a flat? 

SARAH: Not that long. 

KAYLA: (laughing) Okay. 

SARAH: It wasn’t really flat the whole time. 

KAYLA: Okay. 

SARAH: It became flat, you know? 

KAYLA: I see. It wasn’t like a blowout flat tire. 

SARAH: No, it wasn’t a blowout. 

KAYLA: That’s good. 

SARAH: I got to get to the gas station, so I get to the gas station, and I put some gas in my car. I thought it was the back left tire, and it looked fine, so I was confused.  So then I was like, “do I just need to put air in my tire? What’s the deal here?” And then, I was texting my family group chat like “what?” and then I discovered the front left tire was indeed flat, and I said “hm”

KAYLA: Hm, this makes more sense. 

SARAH: (laughs) And then, my mom was surprised by this, but I was actually less stressed once I found out that there was a flat, because it was clear what I had to do, you know? 

KAYLA: I guess that makes sense.

SARAH: Before I was like (grumbling noises), But then, I called AAA, and they said “Okay, let me transfer you to California because we automatically gave you to the Michigan AAA because we thought you were in Michigan, but you’re not.” And then, I waited. I could’ve walked to my house. I was like, a quarter mile away. But I was like “what if they’re early?” so I stayed in my car. And then they were early, actually. The guy came, he was a very talkative guy named Matthew. He was very helpful. He told me  all sorts things. He told me about how he and his buddies used to get discounted tires in this place in Compton. So everyone, just so you know. 

KAYLA: Yeah, that’s really helpful. 


SARAH: He also told me about how he was training someone, a AAA person, and he accidentally stripped the bolts on someone’s car when he was taking their tires. 


SARAH: And it was a Lincoln, like a fancy car. Anyway, now I’m just telling you Matthew’s stories.

KAYLA: I love them. Thank you, Matthew. 

SARAH: And Matthew replaced my tires, and my dad was like “Is it a sideball issue?” and I was like “bruh, I don’t know what that means” and he tried to explain it to me, and I had to Google it. Luckily, Matthew – is his name Matthew? Yeah, his name is Matthew. Did y’all miss me?

KAYLA: What is happening? 

SARAH:  – was like “This is what the issue is” and it was a side ball issue, which means I had to get an entirely new tire. You can’t patch it, I need a new one. So I was like “Okay” Then, the next morning, I go to the tire place and they were like “We don’t have this tire. We have this other tire” – Oh no, my headphone batteries are low. 

KAYLA: Oh no. 

SARAH: I’m going to move faster. But my dad gets discounted ones, because he works for a brand that does tires, so he was like “nah, wait, I’m going to get tires delivered to this place, and they’re going to install them”. And they were supposed to arrive yesterday, so I was only supposed to drive on these tires for 2 days, and I was very brave, and I didn’t go on the highway because you’re not supposed to. 

KAYLA: Very brave. 


SARAH: And the little donut tire was also very, very brave and strong. And then the tires didn’t get there yesterday. So I was supposed to get them replaced today this morning, but then they weren’t there, so they were supposed to get there today. If they get there early enough, I will get them replaced today. If not, I will get them replaced tomorrow. That is my beef. 


KAYLA: (laughing) This sounds like when you ask a kindergartner to tell a story and they’re like “when you…when you do the… and when you, and when you, and then, and then”

SARAH: Yeah, that’s what my brain is. 

KAYLA: I know, it’s just funny.

SARAH:  A little ADHD monster. My juice is I got to see BTS in Las Vegas. 

KAYLA: Big news. 

SARAh: The first weekend. 

KAYLA: In the last four months, Sarah has not stopped being a BTS stan. I know you were all very worried about that. 


SARAH: I’m feeling absolute FOMO because the next two dates are tonight and tomorrow as we record, and I’m not there. But I was fucking there last week, so what’s my fucking FOMO for? Anyway. 

KAYLA: And she had a little sign that said… 

SARAH: “Asexuals love Yoongi” 

KAYLA: Yes. 

SARAH: Hit up my instagram @costiellie if you would like to see that sign. I did hold it up. They didn’t show it on the big screen, which was aphobic, but they did show “Lesbians for Namjoon” and they showed “Bisexuals love Namjoon,” so a lot of gay love for Namjoon. 

KAYLA: Love that for him. 

SARAH: Kayla, what is your beef and your juice? 

KAYLA: My beef is that my body has not been adjusting to the climate change of my living situation.

SARAH: Mmm. 

KAYLA: Louisiana is a very humid place. It is very swampy, and it’s very hot. 

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: It was in the 80s when I left. It was very hot. It felt like summer already. 

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: And then I came here, and it actually feels like spring here. Which is nice, I get to have a little jacket moment. 


KAYLA: But it’s a lot drier. Even though the weather app claims that the humidity is higher here, it’s not. 

SARAH: It’s cooler out. 

KAYLA: Right. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: It’s like a cold humid instead of a hot humid. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: My skin is now incredibly dry, and my face keeps breaking out, and there’s different water so my hair doesn’t know what to do.


KAYLA: Bad times all around for skin and hair.

SARAH: What’s your juice? 

KAYLA: My juice is that I live somewhere with things to do now, which is crazy. We were walking around because we were looking at apartments last weekend – 

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: – and we were in an area of Boston which is comparatively to the rest of Boston was dead but to us was so much was happening, and there was so much stuff to do. And our friend was like “What do you mean? This is dead. How deprived of entertainment were you?” and we were like “Very.” So, I’m excited to live somewhere with things to do. 

SARAH: And you lived in a city too. It’s not like you didn’t live in a city. 

KAYLA: It was a city. There wasn’t a proper downtown. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: It was a business district because it’s where all the government buildings were, so there’s like one street in the downtown. 

SARAH: Oh, she died. Well you know what, now people are just going to be able to hear Kayla on my mic. 

KAYLA: Okay. 

SARAH: Well, let’s wrap this up. 

KAYLA: Yes. 

SARAH: Let me just turn your volume down a bit. (laughs) So you can find our poll on our Instagram. All our social media is @soundsfakepod. If you have Instagram and you don’t follow us yet, now is the time. If you don’t have an Instagram and you want to follow us, get one. (laughs) 

KAYLA: Get one just to follow us. 

SARAH: Just for that. And now we’re going to hop into our patrons. We have a couple new $2 patrons. We have Cyril. 

(whispers) I don’t know how to say it, and I’m sorry. 

We have Prudent Penguin. So prudent, so penguin. And Sophie Roy. Thank you to all three of you for joining even when we weren’t doing anything.


KAYLA: Thank you, so much. 

SARAH: Our $5 patrons… Again, I’m going to read them all. If you expect to hear your name, please listen for it, and if you don’t hear it, maybe check your Patreon. Also, they’re in a new order. We’ve alphabetized them. So. 

KAYLA: Yeah, it’s going to be weird.  

SARAH: It’s going to be weird. Let’s go for it. Alex Istar, AliceIsInSpace, Amanda Kyker, Ariel Laxo, Ashley W, Asrith Vinnakota, Bookmarvel, Brandon Smith, Brooke Siegel, Byron Rusnak, Chris Lauretano, Colleen Walsh, Corinne, Daniel Walker, Doug Rice, Edward Hayes-Holgate, Elizabeth Wheeler, Ellie, Emily M., George Ankers, Green_sarah, H. Valdís, Hadas Drukker, who is new. That is a new one, thank you. 

KAYLA: Wow! 

SARAH:  Jackie Rubashkin, Jacob Weber, Jennifer Smart, Jessica Shea, Jolly Lizbert, Julianne, Kathryn Bailey, Kelly, Lily, Livvy, Mary S., Mattie, Mel McMeans, Melissa Kaufman, Rachel, Ria Faustino, Sam, Savannah Cozart, Scott Ainslie, Sofia P, SongofStorm. Those last two, both new. Thanks Sofia P and SongofStorm.

KAYLA: So many!

SARAH: The Forest Pigeon, The Stubby Tech, and Vishakh, and also there is one who asked to not get a shout out, but know that you are still on my list. Hell yeah. Thanks to all our $5 patrons. Our $10 patrons – again, I’m going to just read what they’re promoting for all of them this week. We’re going big, going home. Arcnes who would like to promote the Trevor Project, Ari K. who would like to promote Thought Slime, Benjamin Ybarra who would like to promote Tabletop games, Changeling MX who would like to promote, DAVID JAY who would like to promote Emergent Strategy by Adrienne Maree Brown, David Nurse, who, I am so confused. That’s just what I wrote. David Nurse is the one that lost a jacket on the London Underground.

KAYLA: David once lost a jacket, and it’s very upsetting. 

SARAH: (laughs) Derek and Carissa, who would like to promote the overthrow of heteronormativity in support of Melody the Hamster, who is scheming to do just that, my Aunt Jeannie who would like to promote Christopher’s Haven, Maggie Capalbo who would like to promote their dogs Leia, Minnie, and Loki, Mattie who would like to promote Gender euphoria, Potater who would like to promote potatoes, delicious. Rosie Costello who would like to promote sticks, preferably long sticks, and I would like to promote Rosie. Barefoot Backpacker who would like to promote their podcast Travel Tales From Beyond the Brochure, The Steve who would like to promote Ecosia, a search engine for the trees. Thank you to all of our $10 patrons. Our $15 patrons are Andrew Hillum, who would like to promote The Invisible Spectrum Podcast, Click4Caroline, who would like to promote Ace of Hearts, Hector Murillo – who bumped up a patronage

KAYLA: While there was nothing.  

SARAH: (laughing) While there was nothing. There was one other person who also did that. I’m blanking now on who it was, I’m sorry. Hector Murillo, who would like to promote friends that are supportive, constructive, and help you grow as a better person. Leila who would like to promote “Love is love” also applying to aro people, Nathaniel White who would like to promote, Nina Maggart – Kayla’s aunt – who would like to promote, and Sara Jones who is @eternalloli everywhere, and not my mom because turned out her payment method had been declined and she didn’t realize it. 


KAYLA: Julie, what the heck? 

SARAH: I told you, she said she was going to fix it, so assuming she will, she would like to promote free mom hugs. 


KAYLA: Okay. 

SARAH: And our $20 patron is Sabrina Hauck. Merry Christmas from your parents this delightful April. Hey, hey, Hoo hoo. We’re back, we’ll be back next week.

KAYLA: We’ve done it. 

SARAH: With a regular episode. Thank you for listening, and tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears. 

KAYLA: And until then, take good care of your cows.

(end music)