Ep 160: Same Podcast, One Year Apart (The First Year)

Hey what's up hello! This week we take a page from Billie Eilish's book and we begin the journey of recording the same podcast episode and answering the same questions every year. Buckle in, it gets emo.

Responding to Asexual Hate Comments: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHho-Sz02h4     

Episode Transcript: www.soundsfakepod.com/transcripts/same-podcast-one-year-apart-the-first-year   

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Transcript

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(0:00)

SARAH: Hey what’s up hello. Welcome to Sounds Fake But Okay, a podcast where an aro-ace girl (I’m Sarah. That’s me.)

KAYLA:… and a demi-straight girl (that’s me, Kayla)

SARAH: talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else that we just don’t understand.

KAYLA: On today’s episode: A Q&A with ourselves.

ALL: — Sounds fake, but okay.

SARAH: Welcome back to the pod. Mmmmm. M’arvelous M’rs. M’aisel.

KAYLA: There’s no way I haven’t done that before. 

SARAH: But have you done the whole title?

KAYLA: I’m unsure. 

SARAH: M’onkey—

KAYLA: M’onk the hit TV show. I am recording this episode from the closet. I’m inside a dark closet.

SARAH: Back in the closet.

KAYLA: I am on the floor of a dark closet and that is—

SARAH: I want pics but Kayla can’t take them herself. 

KAYLA: I can’t get the correct angle. Dean - I don’t know, can’t hear me I guess. I’ll get pictures.
SARAH: We’ll try and get pics.

KAYLA: I wish you could all see me right now other than the fact that I’m not wearing a shirt, I wish you could all see me.

SARAH: Shirts are for the weak. 

KAYLA: It’s hot in this closet.

SARAH: Spicy.

KAYLA: I think I might do this whole episode with my eyes closed. 

SARAH: Okay. Kayla, what are we talking about this week?

KAYLA: This week, well this was Sarah’s idea, but for the past 4 years — did they only do this with Billie Eilish? 

SARAH: Yeah so Vanity Fair has done these interviews with Billie Eilish for four years straight where they ask her the same questions every year and they compare her answers and she can react to her old answers and stuff, and I last night was watching the one from 2020 and I just found it very interesting. And I was like, you know what we should do, Kayla? We should do a Q&A and then next year do the same Q&A.

KAYLA: So Sarah wrote these questions. I don’t know what any of them are.

SARAH: I wrote the questions at 1 am so they’re really emo. 

KAYLA: Perfect.

SARAH: But you know, some of them I ripped from the Vanity Fair video, some of them I made up, some of them are pod related, some of them are personal related. You know, there’s a mix, we got a party.

KAYLA: Wild. I’m ready. 

SARAH: Okay, well do you want me to start with the first question? 

KAYLA: I guess.

SARAH: I spelled it wrong, so it says “what’s your nam?”

KAYLA: What’s your name?

SARAH: Yup what’s your name? Tell us what your name is.
KAYLA: My name is Kayla Kaszyca. 

SARAH: Congratulations. My name is Sarah Costello. What’s today’s date?

KAYLA: Uh, today is Wednesday, December 2nd, 2020.
SARAH: It sure is. How old are you?

KAYLA: That’s such a good question. I am 23. 

SARAH: I am also 23. We’re both 23.

KAYLA: I forgot you’re 23 now. That’s funny.

SARAH: Yeah. How do you identify?

KAYLA: I am demisexual heteroromantic. I’m a cis woman.

SARAH: HeTeRoROmAnTic. Well, I identify as asexual aromantic and also as a cis woman. It’s weird asking the questions and having to answer them myself.

KAYLA: It’s also weird that we all know these things.

SARAH: I’m starting with the basic ones, I don’t think they’re going to change. I’m putting them on the record, okay?

KAYLA: Alright. I understand.

SARAH: Next question - how many Twitter followers does the pod have? 

KAYLA: Oh now I’m going to — but my phone is outside the closet.

SARAH: I can check.

KAYLA: You do it. Won’t that be fun to hear a year from now, “I’m in the closet.” 

SARAH: As of today we have 4,588 followers.

KAYLA: Which is a lot. 

SARAH: It’s a lot.

KAYLA: I don’t know when that happened.

SARAH: I don’t either. Surely don’t know.
KAYLA: Remember when we had 12?

SARAH: How many patrons does the pod have?

KAYLA: I think 101. 

SARAH: 101 that’s so many. We love every one of you.

KAYLA: That’s the real insane number.

SARAH: That’s the really insane one yeah. That is really — I’m just thinking about that number now. It’s a big number.

(5:00)

KAYLA: It used to be — I was transcribing episode 9 earlier today and we talk about — we used to do polls on the Patreon where people could decide what the episode topic was — 

SARAH: Yes, we could never decide.

KAYLA: Yeah so that was the $2 reward and we were like, “oh if you do enough you can choose the topic of the episode and that was the big thing.”

SARAH: I remember when we started our Patreon cause we needed to pay for Soundcloud and then our friend Emma gave us all of the money and then we were like *incoherent noise.*

KAYLA: The fact that 100 people pay us now is wild. And we’re almost going to save the postal service now. And we bought a piece of Ireland. Sometimes I think about things like that. What the fuck have we done?

SARAH: Yeah, what are we doing? Okay, yes. I’m sorry for this next one. Do you have a job and if so what is it?

KAYLA: Stop!

SARAH: I’m sorry! But next year, when you do have a job, you’re going to be like, “wow!” 

KAYLA: I do not have a job. Though I have had many, many interviews.

SARAH: Mm hmm. A classic. Where do you live?

KAYLA: You have to say what your job is.

SARAH: Oh sorry. I forgot that I was asking myself these questions as well. I am an executing assistant, is what I am at a management company. 

KAYLA: In Hollywood, baby. 

SARAH: Where do you live?

KAYLA: I just moved to Baton Rouge, Louisiana. 

SARAH: Woohoo. I also live in an LA. But a different one. The Los Angeles one. 

KAYLA: The Los Angeles variety.

SARAH: What is your relationship status?

KAYLA: I have been dating Dean, my boyfriend for almost 2 years now.

SARAH: So many years.

KAYLA: It does not feel like 2 years. 

SARAH: Time flies.

KAYLA: I am in a relationship status.

SARAH: Wildin’. My relationship status is vibing. Okay. Now we’ve gotten past the basic questions. What was the best part of this year podwise?

KAYLA: I think probably the 6 feet of space fundraiser.

SARAH: I agree.  I wrote answers for some of these, I didn’t for others. But for this one, I wrote “livestream!”

KAYLA: Yeah. Business-wise we got so many new listeners from that. So many people discovered us, we got to meet so many other cool people, influencers, and people from the internet who we’re internet friends with, who we can rely on for things.

SARAH: I think the livestream and then the people in the community that we’ve gotten to know as a result of the livestream and as a result of just getting bigger. I think a lot of that can be really tracked back to the livestream.

KAYLA: I don’t think I saw us as a legitimate staple of the community or a huge part of the community until the livestream.

SARAH: Also David Jay fucking showed up.

KAYLA: Yeah which is wild because I remember we were freaking the fuck out when David Jay entered the chat. And now I’m like, David Jay, I’m on a research advisory board with him. It’s David Jay, my bud. Which is like the fact that I’m so chill now about the concept of David Jay is wild. I don’t think I felt like we were a legitimate thing until after that and it opened so many doors for us to do the Asexuality Conference panel and be taken in the community and stuff. It’s just.

SARAH: Agree. What was the worst part about this year podwise?

KAYLA: Oh.

SARAH: Would you like me to do mine? Mine is -- I would like to remind you that I did write this at 1 am when I was feeling emo. The worst thing about this year podwise is feeling like I don’t do enough for it because Kayla is more into the activism than I am.

KAYLA: But you do all the content.

(10:00)

SARAH: But you do all the activism. 

KAYLA: Yeah but if you weren’t there coming up with topics this week we simply wouldn't have a podcast.

SARAH: I didn’t say it was warranted.

KAYLA: Well this is me telling you it’s not warranted and reminding you. You’re very important.

SARAH: But I felt that a lot more this year because you’ve been into the activism so much.

KAYLA: That makes sense but you’re wrong. I think going along with the first thing of getting bigger and becoming bigger names in the community which kind of sounds egotistical — it sounds like such an asshole thing to say, so sorry — I guess the added responsibility it comes with, like if things happen online or there’s any controversies there’s kind of, it’s not a need but me and you feel it’s a need to step in or say how we feel or react. It’s an added stress I guess.

SARAH: Or sometimes we get dragged into it because we’re seen as bigger names in the community I guess for some fucking reason.

KAYLA: It’s a good problem to have. It's the added responsibility of people knowing who we are. God, I sound like such an asshole. 

SARAH: Kayla’s an asshole.

KAYLA: I’m an asshole.

SARAH: This one is very loaded. What was the worst part about this year personally?

KAYLA: Oh my god. What wasn’t the worst part of this year personally. What’s hard is for this not to be colored by things I’m currently going through. 

SARAH: I know.

KAYLA: I guess if there’s a theme to a lot of the things I’ve struggled with this year — now I’m going to start crying.

SARAH: Good let’s make Kayla cry.

KAYLA: I guess this is a thing that happens in your early 20s. Or in your 20s. Everyone talks about how your 20s are when you’re trying to figure out who you are, your 30s is when you do it. But now that we’re a year out of college I’m starting to realize that I have no idea what I’m doing with my life so the first part of the year was being unsatisfied with my job and feeling like I love what I’m doing with the podcast but it’s not my 9-5 or things like that. I think just trying to figure out what I want to do with my life and how to make that sustainable has been a theme throughout the year that’s made everything hard.

SARAH: I think mine is, obviously everything revolves around COVID right now right? So I think mine is just that I haven’t been able to see people, I haven’t been able to spend time with the people I want to spend time with, and that’s in part because I moved across the country and it’s in part because COVID limits everything. And this year I went the longest without seeing my parents that I’d ever gone, I went longest without seeing my sister than I’ve ever gone, I haven’t seen Kayla in almost a year in person.

KAYLA: I know, it’s so sad. 

SARAH: So you know, that’s definitely the longest we’ve ever gone without seeing each other by far.

KAYLA: Oh for sure. 

SARAH: So, I just have not been able to be with people that I like and tolerate.

KAYLA: Now I’m emo.

SARAH: What has been the best part about this year personally?

KAYLA: I think probably the relationships I’ve been able to build which given what you said doesn’t make sense. But after college, I moved to Connecticut by myself and that was a really scary thing for me but I was able to make really, really good friends at work who are life-long friends now. Like Padya.

SARAH: Hi Padya.

KAYLA: Our transcriber who’s now Sarah’s friend. I met her through work, we were just lucky enough to work together.

SARAH: Padya is my BTS mom.

KAYLA: Yes. Padya is one of my best friends. Things like that. Being able to move somewhere on my own and be independent that way and know I can make friends and things like that and maintain those relationships.

SARAH: Yeah I think mine was similar, even though I think the worst thing was not being able to see people. The best thing has been the ability to still communicate with people over the internet in a more meaningful way because everyone is stuck with that only option. So even though I haven’t been able to — I didn’t see my parents in person in 10 months, I was zooming with them every week. You’re still able to have the relationships and the constant text feeds that never end and I think that’s been good. This was a difficult question for me because I looked at me and I was like, “nothing,” I don’t know. I mean I started my career, that’s a good thing. I like my job, that’s a good thing. 

(15:00)

KAYLA: I also genuinely — the podcast is one of the best things for my year too. But genuinely I struggle to know what I want to do with my life and find fulfillment in that way, like having the podcast and getting into activism is something I can very proudly say I do with my time. 

SARAH: Okay next one. I know that you and I are both really good at rating things 1-10 but I wasn’t sure how else to give this one parameters. 

KAYLA: Oh god.

SARAH: Rate your mental health this year.

KAYLA: Oh god!! Now I have to start between now and December of last year. Now Billie has entered the closet with me and is being annoying. My mental health on 1-10? 

SARAH: 1-10. I think for me I would say 4.5 because shit got fucked because of COVID and I got stressed moving to California and not having a job and getting a job but I have still had good times, not as many as I would have liked and sometimes my brain says fuck you but you know.

KAYLA: I want to give it like a 6.5 maybe. I think it’s hard because the first part of the year before COVID was very, very good because I was having that euphoria after your mental health is really bad and then it gets better because when I first moved to Connecticut, it was the worst mental health I have ever had. I was on the verge of being afraid I was bipolar. Going through that good time of “oh my god everything’s fine” but obviously COVID really fucked me up.

SARAH: And for me, coming back to Michigan fucked me up. Very good to be able to see my family and stuff but it threw me off in not good ways as well. I’m trying to think of the summer and stuff, like what happened to that? I don’t know. Okay, how confident are you in your identity from 1-10? The identity you gave at the beginning of this?

KAYLA: Hmmm.

SARAH: I would say mine is 8.5. I’m solid — but who knows? No one knows.

KAYLA: I would say 8. I think majority of the time I’m very good and I feel good. Recently I’ve been posting short videos on TikTok and Instagram Reels and for some reason, people really hate demisexuality on Instagram especially. So reading some rude comments has been more painful than I thought it would be because I thought I was more confident so I’d say an 8.

SARAH: That’s still pretty good. We did an episode semi-recently on our relationship with our bodies as aspecs so 1-10 how comfortable do you feel in your own body?

KAYLA: Hmm. 

SARAH: This is a difficult one for me.

KAYLA: Like a 6. I gained a lot of weight during quarantine as I think we all did. And I have part of my identity wrapped up in being skinny because as a small child people would be like “oh my god Kayla you’re so tiny, you’re so little” and it became ingrained in me. So, not loving it right now.

(20:00)

SARAH: I’m having trouble ranking this one because my gender identity is doing just fine, not feeling any problems there. But like, you know. We all got those quarantine 15 as one does. But I’ve also at the same time, been like, my body is doing what it should. It’s keeping me alive and it’s getting me from A to B. I’m on a see-saw where I’m like nothing matters and other times I’m like huuuuuu.

KAYLA: It’s very dependent on the way. When I was very skinny, sometimes I was self-conscious of how skinny I looked. I’d be like, your legs are too twiggy or you don’t look good this way so sometimes I try to be like, okay now you’re filled out a bit more, look more like how you wanted to look, but now I have a shit ton of stretch marks. I had to buy a bunch of new pants because none of my pants fit. 

SARAH: It’s dumb because we know objectively, who the fuck cares? 

KAYLA: It’s also the weight I’m at now it’s a healthy weight. If I was this weight for the rest of my life it would be completely healthy. I just need to look healthy, it’s just society.

SARAH: Me too and I don’t honestly — look significantly different to an outsider. To me, I obviously do. It’s just dumb because I know it means nothing and I don’t care about it with other people but of course society makes you care about it yourself. I never gave a number. Too bad.

KAYLA: I will say though. I feel like the clothes I wear, I’ve been happier with recently.

SARAH: That’s good.

KAYLA: I feel like I’ve been paying more attention to the style of the clothes and happier with the things I’m wearing so.

SARAH: Nice. Next question. How often do you should?

KAYLA: Hahah. Everyday.

SARAH: Constantly. All the fucking time.

KAYLA: I should all the time.
SARAH: I try and do these mind games where I know I shouldn’t should. So, I should without using the word should. But it has the exact same effect,

KAYLA: Yeah, I mean.

SARAH: Guys, don’t should. Do as we say. Not as we do.

KAYLA: Yeah. I think especially now that I’m questioning what I’m doing with my life, I’m should-ing even more cause I’m like, I should get this kind of job or I should do this because that’s what everyone else is doing, or that’s what I planned to do when I was eight so.

SARAH: Yeah. The worse my mental health is, the more I should. It's not that my mental health is worse as a result of the should-ing. It’s the should-ing is as a result of the mental health, so. Specially when my brain is being a depressed ass bitch and doesn’t want to cooperate, I’m like yOu sHould Be. And then I’m like, no you shouldn’t should. But then I should-ed myself, by saying I shouldn’t should.

KAYLA: It does get in a loop when you talk about should-ing.

SARAH: It does. What do you want most for the aspec community in the next year?

KAYLA: What I want for the aspec community. I would like it to become more diverse in every sense of the word. Like race, gender, disability, neurodivergence, everything like that. Also in that, I would like big names in asexuality I guess. You have your regulars that everyone knows and I think there can be always be more of that.

SARAH: Give them competition! 

KAYLA: Yeah.

(25:00)
SARAH: For me, representation, put it everywhere. I want a more accepted place in the broader queer community. A broader acceptance from that community being like, yes you do belong here and we want to actively include, I think would be swell.

KAYLA That would be something, wouldn’t it?

SARAH: What gives you hope?

KAYLA: Oh god, in general?

SARAH: This year, in general.

KAYLA: I think Gen Z gives me hope. I think seeing the activism that a lot of high school-aged and younger people have been getting involved in is just very exciting to see. I think people write off the youngest generations a lot of times. And especially since Gen Z is so internet-based and everything like that, I think it’s really easy to. And some of them, as with every generation, are definitely idiots, but.

SARAH: Some of them suck but you know what, that’s just statistics dude.

KAYLA: When I was that age, I was not politically involved at all and I know of people that are 15-16 that are super involved and know what’s going on, which is exciting.

SARAH: I think for me, I’ve got 3 things and they’re all related. The things that give me hope are protests, activists, and young people, generally. I think a lot of times it is young people who are leading the charge for both of those previous things. Just listen, people want change, they’re making change. That gives me hope. What are you most worried about right now?

KAYLA: Hmm.

SARAH: You want to know what mine is?

KAYLA: Sure.

SARAH: People dying. Mass preventable dying occurring because people and governments are selfish and irresponsible. 

KAYLA: You know what’s sad? That wasn’t even my first thought because it’s so normal now.

SARAH: Yeah that’s just the way it fucking is.

KAYLA: Climate change.

SARAH: Yeah, that would be the next thing.

KAYLA: Pandemic, mass incarceration.

SARAH: Racism, inequity. Homelessness is a big deal in Los Angeles specifically.

KAYLA: Economy. Why does stock market have best day and everyone still poor? I don’t know. I don’t quite understand how the stock market works. 

SARAH: The stock market’s dumb and also insurance. Anyway, people dying, that’s what I’m most worried about. A year from now, where do you hope the pod will be? 

KAYLA: Big.

SARAH: That’s really interesting because you know what my answer is?

KAYLA: Small?

SARAH: Same place. I think growth is great and I’d love for it to happen but it wasn’t why we started this pod and it isn’t why we do it now, so I would be perfectly happy if the pod was in the exact same place next year as it is right now.

KAYLA: I have to be honest, I don’t feel the same way.

SARAH: That’s fine.

KAYLA: I’d be sad. 

SARAH: I think that also relates to the pod is a little bit more than a part of your identity thing for you than it is for me.

KAYLA: Yeah, it for sure is.

SARAH: A year from now, where do you hope you will be?

KAYLA: Ugh. I hope I will know what I am doing with my life. 
SARAH: That’s never going to happen. You’re never going to know what you’re doing with your life. That’s how being a human works.

KAYLA: No I know but I hope I have a bit of a better idea.

SARAH: I hope a year from now, I don’t even know. It’s so hard for me to me to imagine what life could possibly be a year from now, just cause everything is so up in the air. Like you know, I don’t know where I hope to be a year from now. I hope to be doing okay. I hope to be hopefully doing better than I am now.

KAYLA: Fair.

SARAH: What is something that you couldn’t do this year that you hope to be able to do next year, whether that’s like, you couldn’t because of COVID or you couldn’t because of other limitations? 

KAYLA: I’d like to travel more.

SARAH: Yeah. I really want to go to a BTS concert but honestly, I don’t even know that’ll happen next year, so.

KAYLA: Yeah who knows. I want to, especially now that I live in Louisiana, I don’t know that I’ll ever live in the south again or in this area again. So especially now that I’m down here I’d like to be able to travel or go to festivals or go to cities I’ve never been to and stuff like that.

(30:00)

SARAH: Send me a fucking beignet in the mail.

KAYLA: I can’t.

SARAH: I would like one.

KAYLA: Yeah, but no.

SARAH: This is a similar question but it’s different. What is one thing that you want out of next year?

KAYLA: Hmm.

SARAH: I just want a fucking widely available vaccine. That’s all I want. It’s hard to think about my own life in regards to next year because my life is so impacted by what the fuck pandemic.

KAYLA: Hmm. I mean like my immediate answer is more financial stability but that’s just me talking as someone who doesn’t currently have a job.

SARAH: Fair though. That’s fair.

KAYLA: That’s just how I am feeling at the moment I guess. 

SARAH: Yeah. What’s one thing that made this year better?

KAYLA: Uhh… My cat.

SARAH: Love a Billie. I think one thing that made this year is hikes.

KAYLA: You did do a lot of hiking.

SARAH: Especially before COVID. 

KAYLA: Yeah.

SARAH: Me and Erin used to go like every weekend.

KAYLA: I do think. I don’t know. I love this cat. She’s a pain in the ass but she’s moved everywhere with me you know?

SARAH: She’s been with you the whole time.

KAYLA: She has. 

SARAH: If you could give the you from a year ago advice what would it be?

KAYLA: Oh my god. I mean how do you even do that when COVID?

SARAH: Like she doesn’t know what’s coming.

KAYLA: She doesn’t fucking understand.

SARAH: I would say — I’m stealing this from Billie Eilish but just appreciate the things you can do now. Even if your friends are going out and you kinda don’t really want to go, Appreciate that you have the option, you know.

KAYLA: I think — maybe this is kind of similar, but take more risks. Don’t get too comfortable. Last year, I was sitting where I was, getting comfortable. Which is how I like to be. I hate change, I hate things like that. I just fucking can’t but yeah.

SARAH: Yeah. What’s something you’re putting off doing right now?

KAYLA: Right as we speak?

SARAH: Just like, today, generally in your life at the moment.

KAYLA: I have a couple of emails I need to answer.

SARAH: Yeah. I need to find someone to live with me. I also need to find a psychiatrist.

KAYLA: Fuck I also need to do that. I need to track the expenses for the podcast for the past month cause I haven’t recently.

SARAH: Good. Why do you do the pod?

KAYLA: I mean I think there’s a lot of reasons. I think it’s a very good way to keep in touch with you. I think it’s important for the community and I also think — I mean, like you said, I think it’s a bigger part of my identity. I think it makes me feel good about what I’m doing for the world, I don’t know. 

SARAH: My initial response is going to sound bad but I don’t think it is bad. The first thing I thought of when I thought of why do I do the pod, I do it because it’s a habit.

KAYLA: Yikes.

SARAH: Which sounds bad but I don’t think it is. First of all, I’m able to talk to you all the time, and it gives me purpose. And I do it because I don’t want to let down the listeners and I don’t want to lose this space we’ve built that has helped so many aspec people because ultimately it’s not about me you know? It’s about this thing that we’ve built, it’s not about whether or not I love editing podcasts which I don’t. But you know, it’s more than me. So, “it’s a habit” sounds kind of bad but it’s not necessarily a bad thing.

KAYLA: You want to more do it than you more want to not do it.

SARAH: Yeah, and it can be really difficult for me to do things that aren’t habits. Just because of the way my brain works, so. Yall keep me accountable.

(35:00)

KAYLA: When Sarah wants to quit the podcast.

SARAH: I never said I wanted to quit the podcast.

KAYLA: When you know she wants to. 

SARAH: That’s not what I said.

KAYLA: But it’s not what you feel in your heart.

SARAH: It’s not. Sum up the year with one song.

KAYLA: With one song?

SARAH: Spotify Wrapped just came out.

KAYLA: I mean there’s a song called Fuck 2020.

SARAH: (laughing): Fair

KAYLA: It’s actually a very good song. So I think it has to be that.
SARAH: Excellent. Okay. Mine is everythingoes by RM which, shout out to Padya for introducing me to the Mono mixtape. RM of course is a member of BTS. But it is — it’s melancholy — but it’s, listen, stuff just happens. And I listened to it a lot on my roof in LA.

KAYLA: Uh huh. Very emo.

SARAH: I think it really embodies the quarantine mood. I needed to go outside so I went to my roof. You know?

KAYLA: I do know.
SARAH: Yeah. Should I end with a fun one or should I end with a serious one? I have 2 more. 

KAYLA: I don’t know.

SARAH: I’ll do a fun one next. What’s the most memorable thing the allos did this year?

KAYLA: Oh god, the allos. What have the allos done this year? Trying to think.

SARAH: I was like, I know this can be a fun question but I can’t think of anything good to answer and I was hoping you would.

KAYLA: They do so so so much.

SARAH: It’s constant.

KAYLA: Do you have an answer?

SARAH: No I don’t. I was like, I know this could be a fun question but I just couldn’t think of a fun answer.

KAYLA: There’s a radio station here that, I haven’t heard them do it, I’ve just heard commercials for it but I guess they’re doing a “hick of the year,” so I guess they’re taking weird news stories about rednecks and they’re going to put them in a bracket. I feel like if we could think of enough crazy things allos have done we could pick an “allo of the year.”

SARAH: Yeah that’s a good point.

KAYLA: Oh man, what have they done?

SARAH: I’m just thinking of having to change The Bachelorette mid-season. That’s a pretty wild thing.

KAYLA: My first thought did go to The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. 

SARAH: Yeah.

KAYLA: Did Love At First Sight come out this year? What was the Netflix they sat in all those cubes?

 ARAH: I know what you’re talking about, I think that came out this year in February.

KAYLA: I think it came out in February. I think I’m going to pick that one. 

SARAH: Final question. What is one thing you would like to say to our listeners?

KAYLA: Ooh. Hi!

SARAH: You’re so fucking stupid.

KAYLA: I mean it has to be thank you right? We’ve had a lot of very exciting opportunities recently, we have a lot of really exciting stuff happening in the near future. 

SARAH: Stuff we can tell you about and stuff we can’t. 

KAYLA: Cause we’re really cool and we have some secret projects. 

SARAH: #Soon.

KAYLA: #Soon. Those wouldn’t have happened if we couldn’t boast about how dedicated of a community we have. Like, the fact that we can go into meetings and tell people, we have this many Patrons, we have this many followers. And they’re all incredibly dedicated, they support us this much.

SARAH: We have 700 people on our Discord. 

KAYLA: The fact that we can go into a meeting and bring those stats and we can’t realistically quantify the ways you guys support us and everything. I mean that’s just, it’s huge.

SARAH: Yeah and I think everytime we get a message where someone’s like, oh really helped me, I’m like, what the fuck did I do? I feel like I didn’t do anything, I’m just talking to Kayla on the phone every week. And I think yall underestimate the power that you as a collective have had and the positive impact you have had on each other as well.

KAYLA: Yeah we were just talking to someone earlier today and we were saying how it means everything to us when someone emails us saying we’ve helped them and everything like that. I think what’s even more heartwarming is when we see people from the Discord communicating with each other and helping each other. Just the fact that we somehow brought people together and now they’re doing their own thing and it’s because we did something. 

(40:00)

SARAH: Because we get on the phone and talk to each other every week. And we started this podcast just for shits and giggles.

KAYLA: And you all are putting in the effort and doing a ton of amazing work and everything. 

SARAH: Mm hmm.

KAYLA: I’m emoooo.

SARAH: Eeeemo! That was our Q&A.

KAYLA: See you next year.

SARAH: Did you cry?

KAYLA: I did cry. Several distinct times.

SARAH: Excellent. Why didn’t you announce it every time? Cause — no I can’t see you. Oh, excellent. Well, that’s been our Q&A. What’s our poll for this week?

KAYLA: I don’t know.
SARAH: I would highly recommend asking these questions to yourself. It’ll make you think. It’ll make you emo.

KAYLA: There’s these journal prompts, it’s a question a day. There’s like 365 of them and you’re supposed to do it every year and I would like to do it.

SARAH: When I moved to Los Angeles, I met up with some of my high school friends before I left. And one of my high school friends gave me this book and you write a sentence a day and I didn’t follow that strictly, I for the most part wrote a song a day. And then sometimes I would write other things but it’s for 5 years. So, you go back to the beginning in 2021 and I’ll be able to see what I wrote on that day a year before and I’m very interested to see. Cause I’ve been actually been doing it every day.

KAYLA: That is exciting. That is the weird thing about having this podcast for 3 years too is like listening back to us talk about what we’re doing at the moment, it’s very weird.

SARAH: That’s partially what this episode is for, so next year we can be like, huh.

KAYLA: I’m excited, I want it to be next year.  

SARAH: Hopefully next year will be better. What’s our poll.

KAYLA: Take one of the questions, make it an open-ended poll. Pick one.

SARAH: We should do an optimistic one like, “what gives you hope” or “where do you hope you’ll be a year from now” or “what’s one thing that made this year better?”

KAYLA: That’s a good one, let me write it down. Also, I just went on Twitter to write this down but everyone’s Spotify Wrapped has been coming out, it’s been very exciting to see how many minutes people have listened to her. 

SARAH: If we were on your top podcasts or anything, I was shook. Seeing those made me realize people actually listen to us. 

KAYLA: There’s someone who, we’re like their sleep podcast, which also that’s one of the biggest honors to me is being someone’s sleep podcast.
SARAH: Gooo to sleeeeeep. Shhhh.

KAYLA: But someone listened to 14 episodes in one day because we are their sleep podcast. 

SARAH: Wildin’. Okay, great. Kayla, what’s your beef and your juice this week?

KAYLA: I mean I think my beef *gasp* oh no I’ve tweeted it. This is not the first time this has happened. If you have our notifications on you’ve already seen it. Let me rewrite it. This is not the first time this has happened! My beef obviously has to be I’m in a closet right now. Me and Dean just moved into our new place yesterday but the truck with all of our things isn’t coming until Saturday. So we’re sleeping on an air mattress, we have nothing to sit on, we have nothing so. It’s very cold, we have no furniture, and we went for about a full day without water. It was just turned on but we couldn’t do anything. We had to pee in the toilet and not flush it it was a whole situation. 

SARAH: Great. What’s your juice?

KAYLA: My juice is Faygo the pop. It’s a Michigan brand, it’s very good and usually, you can’t find it not in the midwest but there’s this tiny corner store a block from our house, mixed in with all the other houses. They have 99 cent Faygo which is everything to me.

(45:00)

SARAH: Excellent. My beef is depression.

KAYLA: Uh huh.

SARAH: And the concept of shoot-ing.

KAYLA: You know what else is my juice? 

SARAH: What?

KAYLA: Is Elliot Page.

SARAH: Elliot Page! That’s true. An excellent piece of juice. My juice is — um

KAYLA: Oh I thought your call had simply dropped away.

SARAH: No I can’t think of one. Something good something good something good. My dad made French toast for dinner last night.

KAYLA: Ooh.

SARAH: That was perfectly adequate. It wasn’t the best thing ever happened to me but I do enjoy eating French toast and since I can’t think of anything good in my life right now, that’s what I’m going to say. 

KAYLA: Our secret news can be your juice.

SARAH: Our secret news can be my juice, yeah. You guys won’t hear this news for quite some time probably. 

KAYLA: I don’t know about that.

SARAH: We’ll see. We’ll discuss it. We’ll talk offline Kayla.
KAYLA: Sarah and I have had 3 distinct business meetings this week. 

SARAH: And it’s a Wednesday. So. Anyway, great. You can tell us about your beef, your juice, what made your year better this year on our social media @soundsfakepod. You can also find us on Patreon, patreon.com/soundsfakepod. Again, thank you to our lovely 101 Patrons. Even the $2 patrons whose names we do not read, we love and appreciate you. 

KAYLA: Our favorite.

SARAH: Yeah, honestly yeah cause I don’t have to worry I’m going to run out of breath reading your names. Kidding. Those I run out of breath reading your names I love you just as equally. Our $5 patrons are Jennifer Smart, Asritha Vinnakota, Austin Le, Perry Fiero, Dee, Quinn Pollock, Emily Collins, Bookmarvel, Changeling MX, Simona Sajmon, Jamie Jack, Jessica Shea, Ria Faustino, Daniel Walker, Livvy, Madeline Askew, Lily, James, Corinne, AliceIsInSpace, Skye Simpson, Brooke Siegel, I just remembered, we didn’t tell them about that video that we did.

KAYLA: Oh shit.

SARAH: We did some voice acting guys. 

KAYLA: You can’t just throw it in then.

SARAH: Yes we can. Spice it up for those who stayed until the end. Spice it up for David Jay Bradley’s Youtube video about Hate Ace comments and honestly, I had a great time readin it. 

KAYLA: I will link it in the episode description.

SARAH: Anyway, where was I? Brooke Siegel, Ashley W, Savannah Cozart, Harry Haston-Dougan, SOUP, Amanda Kyker, Jacob Weber, Vishakh, Rory, Amberle Istar, Rachel, Kate Costello, John, Ariel Laxo, Ellie, Tessa, MattiousT, Courtney Pritchard, Chris Lauretano, Dia Chappell, and Sam. Also, my other juice is that I thought of good Christmas gift ideas this year. I thought of some — well I got Instagram ads that were successful. 

KAYLA: I’m so proud.

SARAH: Our $10 patrons are Arcnes who would like to promote the Trevor Project, Benjamin Ybarra who would like to promote Tabletop Games, anonymous who would like to promote Halloween, Sarah McCoy who would like to promote Podcast From Planet Weird, my Aunt Jeannie who would like to promote Christopher’s Haven, Cassandra who would like to promote their modeling Instagram @liddowred, Doug Rice who would like to promote the book "Native" by Kaitlin Curtice, Maggie Capalbo who would like to promote her dogs Leia, Minnie, and Max, H. Valdís, Purple Chickadee, ichliebevogel.wordpress.com, Barefoot Backpacker, I don’t have anything written, oh god.

KAYLA: I don’t think there was anything there.

SARAH: If there was, Barefoot Backpacker, I am sorry, and I humble myself before you. Barefoot Backpacker would like to promote —

KAYLA: I mean himself probably.

SARAH: The concept of love.

KAYLA: Okay.

SARAH: Ashlynn Boedecker, who is @shlynnbo everywhere, The Steve who would like to promote Ecosia, Ari K. who would like to promote the horror movie reviewer NyxFears, Mattie who would like to promote The Union Series by T.H. Hernandez, and Derek and Carissa who would like to promote the overthrow the heteronormativity in support of: Melody, the Hamster. Our $15 patrons are Nathaniel White - NathanielJWhiteDesigns.com, my mom Julie who would like to promote Free Mom Hugs, my other beef is that guys my COVID test never came back. I sent in a request to be like hey can you manually check for it, and they were like, “yeah nothing came up did you put your information right,” yeah I put my fucking information right. But by then it had been two weeks so we just stopped wearing masks in the house anyway cause I didn’t have any symptoms. Sara Jones who is @eternalloli everywhere, Andy A who would like to promote Being in unions and IWW, Martin Chiesel who would like to promote mental health, Miranda Denton who would like to promote Casa Q, Leila who would like to promote their Instagram @leilaofpaper, Shrubbery oh Shrubbery told us what they would like to promote didn’t they!

KAYLA: Yes, hold on.

SARAH: While Kayla’s doing that, I will think of what Dragonfly wants to promote. Dragonfly wants to promote taking your meds.

KAYLA: I feel @ ed. Shrubbery would like to promote the Planet Earth, it can use all the love we can give right now. And because Shrubbery is a shrub, supporting the earth does help Shrubbery. 

SARAH: Thanks for listening, take your meds, tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears.

KAYLA: And until then, take good care of your cows.