Ep 238: Aphrodisiacs

Hey what's up hello! Today we try to find out what aphrodisiacs are and if they even work in the first place.

Episode Transcript: www.soundsfakepod.com/transcripts/aphrodisiacs    

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(00:00)

SARAH: Hey, what's up, hello. Welcome to Sounds Fake, but okay, a podcast where an aroace girl. I'm Sarah, that's me 

KAYLA: and a bi demisexual girl that's me Kayla. 

SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality and pretty much anything else we just don't understand on today's episode

KAYLA: Aphrodisiacs

BOTH: Sounds fake, but okay

SARAH: Welcome back to the pod

KAYLA: Hello

SARAH: Hi, welcome back to this where you have come to listen for some reason

KAYLA: Uh huh

SARAH: Is everyone good?

KAYLA: Yeah, yeah, how are you? How are you?

SARAH: Are you asking me? You're asking them?

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: Yeah, that was a space for everyone to answer

KAYLA: Oh, sorry

SARAH: Wow, great, or oh, that's too bad. I'm so sorry to hear that

KAYLA: Oh no

SARAH: I understand. 

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: We have housekeeping

KAYLA: Buy our book

SARAH: Buy our book. We're going on break in December

KAYLA: Uh huh

SARAH: But we'll be here for a couple weeks yet, so don't miss us too soon

KAYLA: Uh huh. And I think that's all the news that I can think of

SARAH: Great. Also Kayla has a new PO box in case you missed it

KAYLA: I did. I checked it today because I was passing the post office and there was nothing in it. Can you believe?

SARAH: Wow, unbelievable

KAYLA: There actually was. There was mail from the post office in there

SARAH: Yeah, sometimes the post office leaves mail and sometimes they just leave pieces of paper

KAYLA: Uh huh. It's really cool

SARAH: Because they don't need to put stamps on shit. It's from them

KAYLA: Yeah it's a little surprise

SARAH: Um, great. Kayla, what are we talking about this week?

KAYLA: This week we are talking about aphrodisiacs

SARAH: That's true

KAYLA: I think the reason I thought of this topic was that today I was in a CVS. And I was in the aisle where they have like the lube and the condoms and the sex toys

SARAH: The one where they're like, this is the personal care aisle

Yeah, it's the sex aisle

SARAH: They have sex toys at CVS?

KAYLA: I saw some

SARAH: Wow

KAYLA: Remember how we read about them being at Walmart?

SARAH: Yeah, but Walmart makes more sense to me than CVS

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: Anyway, and while I was in that aisle they had the like fucking libido supplement medicine or whatever

SARAH: Ugh gross

KAYLA: And I was just like, what are we doing here?

SARAH: What are we doing?

KAYLA: And for some reason it just made me think of aphrodisiacs

SARAH: Um, yeah, well and we had that Reddit post last week that was like

KAYLA: his musk. Yeah, I guess those are kind of similar

SARAH: Yeah, that's what I thought of when you said it

KAYLA: But like I've never looked at the science or the history behind it. I've just heard like, if you've never heard of an aphrodisiac before. It's like, allegedly food like chocolate or oysters is supposed to like heighten your sex drive

SARAH: Does it have to be food? I thought it could be like a smell

KAYLA: I always thought it was a food

SARAH: Well. We have this crazy thing at our disposal

KAYLA: So well, so I found a BBC article that I thought we could go through

SARAH: It's any food or drug that arouses the sexual instinct induces venereal desire and increases pleasure and performance. So it – 

KAYLA: I don't care for that word

SARAH: I, ven, vene, vene, vene, no, there is no erial, it's just vener, vene, whatever

KAYLA: I don't like it

SARAH: I think it could be a scent

KAYLA: I think it could be

SARAH: Natural aphrodisiacs like cannabis or cocaine

KAYLA: Now cannabis? Yes

SARAH: (laughing) Okay

KAYLA: Now cannabis can make a bitch horny

SARAH: My understanding of the weed, I say, is a person who has never done it

KAYLA: Who's never done it

SARAH: Also, a person who doesn't do the sex

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: But doesn't it make you like super chill and wouldn't that make you not want to be like, yeah, let's have some wild sex right now. Because that involves energy

KAYLA: Uh, well there's different strains of weed. Some are like sleepy weed and some is like awake weed

SARAH: Awake weed?

KAYLA: I wouldn't say it like makes you awake, it's just like not sleepy. It doesn't like make you more awake than you are, but it's like, it doesn't make you tired

SARAH: Okay

KAYLA: What I would say is that like, alcohol 

(05:00)

KAYLA: Usually like dulls your senses, like especially the sense of touch. Like you just, you know, you like, some people say like the tip of your nose goes numb. Or like you can't like feel your extremities as much. Weed is like the opposite, it like heightens your senses

SARAH: Hm, interesting

KAYLA: And also sometimes it just makes people horny

SARAH: Yeah, well I'm looking at healthline.com right now

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: And Healthline says that it has lists of like well-known aphrodisiac foods but that are not really backed by science. And one of them is alcohol. And they said it may act as an aphrodisiac by helping both men and women relax and get in the mood. However, a high alcohol intake can increase arousal, no wrong. A high alcohol intake can reduce arousal and sexual function. So moderation is key

KAYLA: That's, that's very true. I feel like a lot of times when you're super drunk you can have sex. But it might not be to like completion

SARAH: Yeah, I've heard of dudes who when they're really drunk they can't get it up

KAYLA: Yeah, that sounds about right

SARAH: Sucks to be you bro. Maybe you've seen a drunk so much

KAYLA: Psh. Idiot

SARAH: (laughing) Sorry, sorry

KAYLA: Yes?

SARAH: there's just another on this list of things that are unconfirmed. Epimedium and I was like, what is this? Also known as horny goat weed

KAYLA: Okay?

SARAH: it's popular in traditional Chinese medicine for treating ailments like erectile dysfunction

So animal studies provide some early support for this use but human studies are needed.

Horny goat weed, it probably is a weed that makes goats horny. That's probably where it got the name. Because they said it's, in animal studies it proves that that could be true but it doesn't have the human studies. So the goats got horny

KAYLA: I don't like that. Would you like some knowledge from the BBC?

SARAH: Please.

KAYLA: So it looks like this article does both the science and some history which is fun. This is an article from the BBC. It's by Jessica Brown. Thanks Jessica

SARAH: Thanks Jessica

KAYLA: Well, do aphrodisiacs really work? Who’s to say?

Historically aphrodisiacs have included – So it starts by talking about how like chocolate, strawberries, oysters are like the popular ones to talk about, but historically aphrodisiacs have included even quirkier edibles including the toxic Spanish fly

SARAH: Uh

KAYLA: ground rhinoceros and rare plant extracts

SARAH: Rhinoceros?

KAYLA: Apparently during the research for her book intercourses co-author Martha Hopkins found that almost every food has been considered an aphrodisiac at some time

SARAH: Good

KAYLA: She says historically foods considered to be aphrodisiacs were hard to find, rare, or expensive like truffles, foie gras

SARAH: What about health line says pistachios?

KAYLA: Caviar. Or

SARAH: Are pistachios hard to find?

KAYLA: So things… Okay, stop. I'm reading. Things are either things that it's either rare or hard to find like a truffle or caviar or things that are shaped like a sex organ like asparagus or artichokes or even animal testicles. So people are just like, uh, looks like a dick

SARAH: Oh man

KAYLA: In the 17th century everything from pigeons to almonds to parsnips were considered aphrodisiacs

SARAH: Pigeons? Yeah I really get hot when I think about eating a pigeon

KAYLA: Yeah, a yumbi. Apparently they were associated with reproduction and fertility

SARAH: Probably because they're everywhere

KAYLA: Okay, here's some science for you, you ready? So this is a part of the article called sexy snacks. For those who have problems with their circulation, like your blood, it is true that certain foods can help in a similar way to Viagra by relaxing blood vessels and improving blood flow to the vegetable – I meant the genitals. Please

SARAH: The asparagus, you know

KAYLA: Yeah, you know what? God, maybe they're right. Uh, the amino acid L-arginine found in foods such as pumpkins, walnuts, and beef is converted into nitric oxide in the body which increases blood flow. And sort of foods with omega-3 fatty acids including salmon and avocado

SARAH: That seems to be the case with pistachio nuts here on Healthline. 

KAYLA: Mm

SARAH: Now, let me just tell you, the first sentence of this section says, people have been eating pistachio nuts since 6000 BC. How do you know?

(10:02)

KAYLA: Yeah, wait

SARAH: no one ate a pistachio before then? Did they not exist before then? You can't know exactly when the pistachio evolved

KAYLA: Someone wrote down, ate a pistachio today. This is new

SARAH: This is new. Pistachio. Anyway, um, but it says, blah blah blah blah, they may also help reduce symptoms of erectile dysfunction in one small cell emails who consumed 3.5 ounces or 100 grams of pistachio nuts per day for three weeks experienced increased blood flow to the penis and firmer erections. 

KAYLA: Hm 

SARAH: Experts have suggested that these effects may be due to the ability of pistachios to improve blood cholesterol and stimulate better blood flow throughout the body, however, this study did not use a placebo group which makes it difficult to interpret the results more studies are needed before strong conclusions can be made

KAYLA: That seems true. The article said though that like, if you don't have a blood flow issue, then obviously these foods, like

SARAH: It's not going to be the same

KAYLA: Scientifically, yes, these foods are good for your blood flow, I guess, but like, if you don't have bad blood flow in the first place, it's not like it's going to make your blood flow extra

SARAH: Yeah. Blood flow extra

KAYLA: Let's see. The article says, but when most of us think of aphrodisiacs though, we think about sexual – we don't think about sexual function, we think about desire, which is true

Even though if I'd heard before that aphrodisiacs were supposed to make you better at sex, I'd always heard that it just like makes you horny

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: I don't know who was saying that. Studies have shown that cocoa can increase blood flow in parts of our bodies beyond our torso, but when it's direct relationship with sexual desire was studied, there was no evidence to support that it's an aphrodisiac. There's in fact no evidence that any one food heightens sexual arousal or desire, but there's one exception, which is alcohol, there is a small number of studies that show that alcohol is linked to arousal, but like you said, can also impede sexual performance

SARAH: Yeah. I'm now looking at this list of again things that people say are aphrodisiacs, but there's not really necessarily support for it. Chocolate, studies provide little to no evidence. Oysters, now get this. One study reports that they may have some libido boosting effects in rats

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: So

KAYLA: Those horny bastards

SARAH: You've heard of horny goatweed. Now, horny ratfish

KAYLA: (laughing) Mm, yum

SARAH: But there are no studies that exists supporting the libido enhancing properties of oysters and humans. And then this one, which is called chaste berry. Studies suggest this fruit may influence hormone levels and reduce premenstrual syndrome symptoms in women. However, there's no evidence that it offers any libido boosting benefits. Who called it chaste berry? Like chaste like C-H-A-S-T-E

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: Who did that?

KAYLA: Who did that?

SARAH: And then it says honey allegedly been used for centuries to bring romance into marriages. One variety called mad honey is even marketed as a sexual stimulant. Yet no studies support this and it may contain dangerous toxins. Then we have horny goatweed.

And then we have hot chilies, according to popular belief capsaicin, caps, whatever. The compound that gives hot chilies or spiciness stimulates nerve endings on the tongue. Causing the release of sex drive boosting chemicals, however, no studies support this belief of alcohol. We already did that

KAYLA: Oh

SARAH: Sorry, I'm talking so fast

KAYLA: It was really fast

SARAH: I have all day, every time I've spoken, I've been about three times too fast

KAYLA: I love that for you

SARAH: Thank you

KAYLA: Part of this article is talking about like different diets like the Mediterranean diet or things like that. Or like holistic health and its effect on sexual function. And it's talking, this lady is saying. What we do know is that for people who exercise have a healthy diet and lower stress

All these elements work together and they have better sex lives. Which like…

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: Yeah, I guess. Like if you're happy or you're probably having better sex And like, if your blood flow good because you eat good blood food then like, your penis work better. Sure, I don't know. Science

SARAH: I'm now on WebMD, it's talking about different herbs. First of all, it says ginseng, some say it's an aphrodisiac because it actually looks like the human body. That makes no sense

KAYLA: Wait, what food is that?

SARAH: Ginseng

KAYLA: What's, how do you spell that?

SARAH: G-I-N-S-E-N-G. It does look like a human body. Or it can

KAYLA: Wait, spell it again

(15:00)

KAYLA:  I think I just stumbled across an anime wolf

SARAH: G-I-N-S-E-N-G

KAYLA: S-E-N-G. Spell, I, there's no vegetables showing up

SARAH: G-I-N-S-E-N-S as in Sarah S-E-N

KAYLA: I found it. First I found an anime wolf, this looks nothing, okay, no, I actually have seen, okay, none of the pictures I'm seeing look like a human.. But I have seen one of these

SARAH: It can look like a human

KAYLA: Yes, I have seen one

SARAH: Apparently the word ginseng means man root

KAYLA: That's funny

SARAH: Anyway, then we have yohimbe which is an herb found in Africa and India that for centuries has been thought to possess aphrodisiac qualities. It works by stimulating nerve centers in the spine thereby improving the capacity for erection without increasing sexual excitement. These days some call it the herbal Viagra. Unfortunately, there are side effects to taking this herb which include anxiety, weakness, overstimulation, paralysis, and hallucinations

Sounds like a large price to pay for the possibility of better sex, don't you think? Yeah, I think so

KAYLA: Bro. I'm trying to look up the history of aphrodisiacs because like I'm very… Like obviously not scientifically backed, like the last part of this BBC article is talking about like, yeah, of course foods don't like automatically made you horny. If we ate any food that had an effect that strong, we wouldn't be eating it all the time, that's weird

SARAH: Yeah, how about this, Spanish fly

KAYLA: Yeah, tell me

SARAH: No discussion of aphrodisiacs to be complete without mention of Spanish fly, the most legendary of the love drugs but also the most dangerous. Spanish fly or cantherie, cantherides, cantherides is extracted from dried beetle dung. Reported sexual excitement after taking Spanish fly stems from its ability to irritate the urogenital tract causing a rush of blood to the genital area. And that's not the downside. Spanish fly is a poison that burns the mouth and throat and can cause urinary infections scarring of the urethra and in some rare cases death

KAYLA: Um

SARAH: I will say I slowed down too much on that one

KAYLA: I… didn't like that

SARAH: To irritate the urethra. So it fucks up your pee and sexy tract. And so then your body's like, oh no, I gotta send some blood to help. And people are like, yeah, sexy

KAYLA: I…

SARAH: So many questions

KAYLA: Found a long article about history, a lot going on here. There are references to aphrodisiacs in ancient Egypt, Greece and Rome, pre-modern China, India and the Middle East and several in Africa and South America

SARAH: Now this article says aphrodisiacs may well be the one thing that crosses all barriers. Race, culture, ethnicity, age, making it unanimous, we all want to have better sex. Speak for yourself. Some of us don't want to have any. Oh, cosmopolitan. Now this is exciting. Don't make me click through photos. I'll kill myself. 

KAYLA: I hate those

SARAH: Listen, okay, but this one's funny. So cosmopolitan, they've done some good articles on asexuality. We've been interviewed for some of them. In general, they tend to be good with asexual issues, but it's also cosmopolitan

KAYLA: What year is this article from?

SARAH: 2021

KAYLA: That's tough, I was hoping it was old

SARAH: The first one is arugula

KAYLA: I've never heard that before

SARAH: I thought you meant you've never heard of arugula

KAYLA: I've never heard of arugula

SARAH: And I was like, bestie, that is my sister's cat's name

KAYLA: I know that

SARAH: It's one of the oldest aphrodisiacs around, and the dark leafy greens are vital to sexual health. According to a study at Al Nahrain University, in addition to boosting male fertility, arugula can help block out environmental contaminants that wreak havoc on our libidos. That does not sound real. Olive oil. Just imagine dipping some fresh bread or pita into quality olive oil is enough to turn me on, but there are actual reasons why the oil is so damn sexy. 

(20:00)

SARAH: Olive oil is rich in antioxidants, which keeps the skin smooth and the body running but additionally, the oil itself has been used for sensual massages since ancient Egyptian times. Okay, that's not an aphrodisiac. That's not what an aphrodisiac is

KAYLA: No

SARAH: It's just saying that that is being like, oh, you associate it with sex. Cinnamon

KAYLA: I have some very juicy history for you

SARAH: Yeah?

KAYLA: Pope Gregory, I think the fourth, I'm not great at Roman numerals

SARAH: IV?

KAYLA: IX

SARAH: The ninth

KAYLA: Ninth, sorry. Decreed in the 13th century that there was a new crime of sorcery by witches that they would cause impotence in men and that the devil in witches would inflict impotence and infertility via magic spells to thwart a married couple's procreative attempts

and so they started being like, do aphrodisiacs to fix it.The pope was like, eat oysters

SARAH: The pope was like, God says sex

KAYLA: Wow, there's a lot of stuff about witches in here

SARAH: Cosmo says basil, truffles, ginger, which is ginseng, same idea

KAYLA: This is so funny

SARAH: What?

KAYLA: They're just throughout history, there are men who are struck with impotence because it happens with the penis and they just blame witches.

SARAH: Mkay

KAYLA: They're just like, my dick won't work, a witch must have done it. Oh man, that's so funny

SARAH: Sweet potato, maca, which I don't know what this is, but this is not the first time I've seen this. It's a plant which has roots rich in magnesium and fiber, which are good for improving stamina and well-being. Oh, it's an Incan root. It's Peru's natural viagra. Pumpkin. It is potassium and fiber, which is both good for stamina. You know what else is good for stamina? Fucking protein

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: As well as magnesium, which can help calm nerves and muscles. You tell me someone's eating a whole pumpkin pie and they're like, let me fuck now

KAYLA: No, good night, I'm going to bed

SARAH: Why are you specifying champagne?

KAYLA: I don't think that's true

SARAH: Champagne is nasty. Why are you specifying champagne? Literally all the description here is just about alcohol, not about champagne. Celery, no

KAYLA: I did see a lot about red wine specifically too, which I feel like every other day a new study about red wine comes up

SARAH: It's supposed to be romantic

KAYLA: They can't decide if it's good for you or if it's bad for you or if you should have a glass a day or not. They can't decide

SARAH: Oh my god, celery. Nuguf says that celery contains small amounts of androstinone, which is a pheromone that some people find attractive in men. No word on how much celery you'd have to eat to start sweating a love potion, but hey, if you have the time. I'm really anti-celery

KAYLA: Celery does not have a smell

SARAH: It does. It's not strong. You have to get close to it

KAYLA: I guess it does a little, but strong enough to sweat it out, like it's not, what's the one that does smell?

SARAH: Asparagus. Asparagus, I was –

KAYLA:  stinky

SARAH: Yeah, I have a moral opposition to celery

KAYLA; Mmm

SARAH: It doesn't taste like anything. And it's stringy

KAYLA: It is quite stringy. I like it as a ranch vehicle

SARAH: It takes more energy to chew a celery than it provides

KAYLA: That's true

SARAH: And it's not good

KAYLA: I feel about celery that it is a way for me to eat ranch that isn't weird

SARAH: I don't do sauces dips or dressings

KAYLA: You can't just eat ranch, but you can just dunk a celery, you know what I mean?

SARAH: Mmm. Garlic, just eat a bunch of garlic and breathe in your partner's face

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: Pine nuts

KAYLA: Hmm

SARAH: They can increase your health, which can potentially increase libido, that's true of anything. Ginseng, which is not the same as ginger, which I kind of made it seem like ginger and ginseng were the same thing, but in my head they're the same thing. I know they're not actually, but in my head they're the same thing. Apples?

KAYLA: I did see that

(25:00)

SARAH: An apple a day correlated with better sexual quality of life and people with vagina

KAYLA: I saw–

SARAH: I like that phrasing, first of all

KAYLA: The BBC article said something about apples and berries because they're anti-inflammatory, I think it's another blood thing

SARAH: Saffron helps increase sperm motility. What is motility? I thought it said mobility

KAYLA: I bet it's like how fast the sperm swim

SARAH: It's its capability of movement. So it's…

KAYLA: They swim faster

SARAH: Swimmers. And it can decrease some of the sexual side effects from taking certain antidepressants. Interesting. So if you take an antidepressant

KAYLA: I doubt that very much

SARAH: That decreases your sex drive, you can just down some saffron. Hot chilies, no. Figs

KAYLA: Ew

SARAH: Not only do figs look sexy

KAYLA: They don't

SARAH: They look vaguely vaginal in this picture

KAYLA: I think you could literally make any fruit look vaginal

SARAH: You absolutely can, you're correct. Asparagus. Free avocado

KAYLA: I really don't believe the asparagus one. Asparagus smells bad, it looks bad, it tastes bad. It makes your pee bad

SARAH: (laughing) The Aztec word for avocado is Awakato, which means testicle

KAYLA: I guess. I guess

SARAH: That's funny

KAYLA: I mean I guess

SARAH: Bananas? Why? Because it looks like a dick?

KAYLA: I really think that ancient people were just like. This witch cast a spell on my penis. I have to fix it, this one looks like a dick. Surely this is the one

SARAH: Your least favorite phallic fruit to eat in public. But it contains all these things that are supes important to keep your energy levels up while you bone. That's any food. Chocolate, no. Oysters, been there done that. Pomegranates. What are we? Persephone?

KAYLA: I think that's correct

SARAH: They can help with erectile dysfunction? Red wine, no. Salmon. It helps your libido by supplying the building blocks for production of estrogen, testosterone, and prodrest, progesterone. You know the one. I think that's just any food

KAYLA: Okay, but the amount of any one food you would have to eat to actually change your hormone levels

SARAH: It would fuck you up

KAYLA: Like, no

SARAH: Almonds and walnuts not only have these been a symbol of fertility and art forever

KAYLA: Why?

SARAH: Blah blah blah blah blah. That's interesting. Dr. Hope adds that the aroma of almonds is purported to arouse passion of almonds?

KAYLA: Isn't the smell of almonds what cyanide smells like or whatever?

SARAH: If it's going to be either almonds or walnuts I would say walnuts. Because you know

KAYLA: I don't think I like the smell of a walnut

SARAH: It's like. No, I'm thinking of chestnuts roasting on an open fire. Not walnuts

KAYLA: Okay, but am I wrong? Isn't it almonds? What's the smell that they're like, if you smell this there's like a gas leak or something?

SARAH: I don't know, vanilla? Not vanilla, I'm just reading

KAYLA: Isn't that almonds?

SARAH: I don't know. Watermelon. No, no, watermelon is just water. Coffee makes you shit. It would be great for sex

KAYLA: It did not say that

SARAH: And strawberries. Whipped cream. Cherries, that's just context

KAYLA: Cyanide

KAYLA: Sometimes cyanide smells like bitter almonds

SARAH: Okay, now it lists some things that are not an aphrodisiac. The first one is microwave popcorn

KAYLA: Sorry, this is still from the same article?

SARAH: (laughing) Yes

KAYLA: I disagree, I love microwave popcorn

SARAH: But is it an aphrodisiac? Axe explains that the chemicals found in the lining of microwavable popcorn bags and non-stick pots and pans – Puffoa, have been linked to lower sperm counts. 

KAYLA: What? 

SARAH: Well, I got zero of those to begin with, so it's fine

KAYLA: It has nothing to do with libido, I don't think

SARAH: Not an aphrodisiac: dairy products

KAYLA: Yeah, that's, you know, I do understand that

SARAH: Dairy products like milk and cheese from cow's milk can have synthetic hormones and then negatively affect estrogen and testosterone levels. So you're telling me when I have microwave popcorn and a glass of milk

KAYLA: That's like literally your whole diet

SARAH: Hey, I drink way less milk than I used to

KAYLA: Thank God

SARAH: But one of the times that I do drink milk is if I am eating popcorn

(30:00)

SARAH: and I drank all of my cherry coke already. Because I can't get it, I can't open another cherry coke, that's not allowed, that's against the rules

KAYLA: Oh, okay

SARAH: Or if it's like the middle of the day, you can't open a cherry coke in the middle of the day, the cherry coke is for dinner

KAYLA: Oh, okay

SARAH: You know?

KAYLA: No

SARAH: We've finally reached the end of the article and I clicked on next and it sent me to an article called “The Best Zodiac Inspired Sex Positions for Every Sign”

KAYLA: No. I am curious. Yeah, you know what, I am curious though. Like is it based on like the shape of your zodiac sign? That would be kind of silly

SARAH: I don't know, but the first one is Aries and it shows two sapphics and I support that

KAYLA: Uh-huh

SARAH: All hands on deck for Taurus

KAYLA: Oh, thanks

SARAH: Are these all sapphic? I love that for us

KAYLA: She was a sapphic

SARAH: I think this one's supposed to be a man. The fuck?

KAYLA: Gross, get it out of here

SARAH: (laughing) Why do we have a man?

KAYLA: What?

SARAH: Whoa. I'm so sorry, I'm so so so sorry. This one says to use a mutual toy like a double-ended vibrator. Sit on your partner's lap and have each of y'all take an end and stick it in an orifice

KAYLA: Oh no, don't say those words

SARAH: Maybe a bad click combo in anal anal mix, whatever you want

KAYLA: I don't like the word orifice, actually

SARAH: Oh man

KAYLA: Anyway, back to the topic at hand

SARAH: Smelling things and eating things

KAYLA: Oh wait, is that why oysters, okay, I just found an article in Vogue that's a brief history of aphrodisiacs. And it's talking about how you know how Aphrodite was like born from a clam or whatever

SARAH: Is that why?

KAYLA: That's what I'm saying. So that's, and they're saying that's why seafoods are like seen as aphrodisiacs. Cause she like came from a clam

SARAH: Cause bitch came out of a clam. Yeah

KAYLA: What the heck? Herbs and spices like basil, mint, cinnamon, cardamom, ginger, pepper, saffron and vanilla were forbidden during medieval times because they were often used in love potions. These bitches hate a witch

SARAH: They really do. I'm learning more about horny goatweed

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: Hold on, let me tell you some alternate news

KAYLA: Oh my god, this article has recipes for love potions. Just kidding, it's tuna avocado tartar with caviar. It's, they're just making, that's just, they took as many quote unquote aphrodisiacs as possible and said let me make a dinner

SARAH: That's disturbing

KAYLA: Absinthe?!

SARAH: Sounds horrible

KAYLA: No

SARAH: Okay

KAYLA: Not absinthe, sorry, continue

SARAH: At the medium, also known as yin yang kuo, which is the name in Chinese. Baron wart

Bishops hat. 

KAYLA: Sexy. 

SARAH: Fairy wings. Or horny goatweed

KAYLA: Okay, why don't we call it, like why did we go for that one?. There's cuter names

SARAH: Horny goatweed is funny

KAYLA: Yeah, but fairy wings, cute

SARAH: Wow, there's a lot of science about plants

KAYLA: Yeah, it's a whole field of study. That is a whole thing people –

SARAH: No, but just like in this Wikipedia article, a large part of it is Propagation. 

KAYLA: Wow, you could just grow it yourself. 

SARAH: You know, they're evergreen hardy perennials

KAYLA: Great

SARAH: They can also be deciduous hardy perennials

KAYLA: So happy for them

SARAH: There’s literally like one line about it being an aphrodisiac in this article and the rest of it is like science. I love that for them

KAYLA: Disgusting, I hate science

SARAH: Ambrian is found in the gut of sperm whales. It is commonly used in Arab cultures as relief medication for headaches or as performance enhancer. The chemical structure of Ambrian has shown to increase testosterone levels triggering sexual desire and sexual behavior in animal studies only. Further research is needed to know the effects on humans

You know what probably has a different effect? Ambian

KAYLA: Okay, that's probably very true

SARAH: Bufatainin is found on the skin and glands of bufo toads. It is commonly used in West Indian and Chinese cultures. 

(35:00)

SARAH: West Indian and Chinese? These aren't next to each other. Okay. Well, maybe they don't have any in East India. West Indian cultures use it as an aphrodisiac called love stone Chinese cultures use bufatainin as a heart medication called chansu. Research shows it can have a negative effect on heart rate. Interesting how one culture was like aphrodisiac and the other one was like heart medication

KAYLA: Yeah, those seem opposite. I just think it's wild that going back to the ancient times. People were still obsessed with aphrodisiacs. People have been so obsessed with sex drive for so long. 

SARAH: There's a whole Wikipedia page that's called cannabis and sex

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH; The orbital frontal cortex and hippocampus help with the formation of new memories and the cannabinoid rise that receptors are found in these areas as well

KAYLA; Okay

SARAH: Now I'm learning about weed. What a big learning day

KAYLA: Honestly, so much

SARAH: Okay. Well, do we think we've hit our limit?

KAYLA: I mean, I don't know what else there is to learn. I just think it's very like reading about the history of like oh. People were like obviously in the ancient times they did not maybe have the medicine to understand like why impotence is the thing or like why it's hard for some women to get like sexual pleasure like those kind of things

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA:  and so you're like oh it's a witch like sure, that's like just how they explain things back then and so then of course you would come up with something like an aphrodisiac. It's just it's not surprising to me. It's just so disappointing to me I suppose that they are still such like prevalent things in today's culture

SARAH: Yeah. And like some some of these things have been used for millennia

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: And like know what I don't know like I feel like my entire life I've heard things like oh oysters is an aphrodisiac. Like it's in pop cultures and TV shows and it's like

SARAH: I've never heard that in my life but maybe we live in different worlds

KAYLA: Yeah, perhaps

KAYLA: And it's like what are we like why? I get like sex sells and shit but like good god y'all

SARAH: It also seems interesting to me because the some of them were gendered

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: And the female ones was about like libido and like wanting sex. And the male ones were more about making the sex work better

KAYLA: Yeah, well because you just assume that all men want sex that clearly if there was a sex issue it would just be like a physical one.

SARAH: And that some women don't want sex enough so we need to make them want it more. You know?

KAYLA: I did see one of the articles I was skimming about history was talking about how in old times I think some like certain religions especially your certain cultures thought that like a woman had to get pleasure in order for a baby to be made

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: Or there was some Dutch guy that was like I don't think the woman has to have pleasure for the baby to be made but if she doesn't the baby's gonna come out lazy and stupid

SARAH: (laughing) Oh god

KAYLA: So I guess so I guess they were just very interested in women having high libidos because they were like that's the only way a baby will be made

SARAH: Oh my goodness

KAYLA: Or they'll just be stupid

SARAH: There's one that I don't know where it went. Oh, here it is. Let me just read this whole paragraph from the Wikipedia page because it's interesting. Ancient civilizations like Chinese, Indian, Egyptian, Roman and Greek cultures believed that certain substances could provide the key to improving sexual desire, sexual pleasure and/or sexual behavior. This was important because some men suffered from erectile dysfunction and could not reproduce, men who were unable to impregnate their wives and father large families were seen as failures, whereas those who could were respected, hence a stimulant was needed. Others who did not suffer from this also desired performance enhancers. Regardless of their usage, these substances gained popularity and began to be documented with information being passed on generations. Hindu cultures wrote poems dated back to around 2000 to 1000 BC that spoke of performance enhancers, ingredients and usage tips. Chinese cultures wrote texts dated back to 2697 to 2595 BC. Roman and Chinese cultures documented their belief in aphrodisiac qualities in animal genitalia while Egyptian wrote tips for treating erectile dysfunction. This is the interesting part, to me. In post-classical West Africa, a volume titled advising men on sexual engagement with their women from the Timbuktu manuscripts acted as a guide on aphrodisiacs and infertility remedies. It offered advice to men on, quote, winning back, unquote, their wives. According to Hammer, at a time when women's sexuality was barely acknowledged in the West, the manuscript, the kind of Bedecker? to orgasm, offered tips for maximizing sexual pleasure on both sides, which is interesting

(40:10)

KAYLA: Yeah, that's revolutionary

SARAH: But also, like, winning back their wives, who took them?

KAYLA: Yeah, that's weird

SARAH: Did they not feel like having sex with you? Is that what it was?

KAYLA: Yeah, collectively all of the women were like, nah, good actually

SARAH: Alright, well, we've talked about it

KAYLA: Yup

SARAH: Did we get anything out of it? I don't know, you know, we did, we did, and what we got was the phrase horny goatweed

KAYLA: That's true, and that's very important to me

SARAH: That's all we need. What's our poll for this week?

KAYLA: Oh, man

SARAH: (laughing) Would you try horny goatweed?

KAYLA: I don't know

SARAH: I mean, part of me wants to be like, do you think there's any truth behind aphrodisiacs? but I almost feel like we'll get almost everyone saying no

KAYLA: Yeah, I mean

SARAH: maybe we'll be surprised

KAYLA: Yeah, well, you can ask it, we'll see

SARAH: Okay. Tell us, world. Kayla, what is your beef and your juice this week?

KAYLA: Mmm. My beef is that I've just been very sleepy this week. I just, you ever have a week where you're so tired

SARAH: Sleppy girl

KAYLA: So that's, I'm just so sleepy, but my juice is that I finally got to schedule my first visit, my first appointment for my neuropsychological testing. So we can see if I'll get a hot new diagnosis

SARAH: Ooh, so spicy and fun

KAYLA: Very exciting. They said like the actual test, like it'll be a while because I have to do this appointment and then there'll be like the actual testing one 

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: and then testing is going to take like hours, like all day. Nice

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: Get to talk about myself and take tests about myself all day

SARAH: Yeah. My beef and my juice is I don't know and then my juice and my beef is I don't know

KAYLA: Mmm

SARAH: And then my beef is I don't have any food but I'm about to leave town for like more than a week. And so I, there's, I, why would I buy more food?

KAYLA: Very true

SARAH: My juice is I'm not out of cherry coke. I am out of Parmesan cheese though, what the fuck am I supposed to do? All I eat is noodles

KAYLA: No

SARAH: You can tell it's about your beef, your juice, your thought on aphrodisiacs and or oysters on our social media @sounds fake pod. We also have patreon/ patreon.com/soundsfakepod. If you become a patron you can get one day early access to these podcasts if for some reason you want that. We have a new $2 patron, it is Emma Friese. I don't know, your, your money was in dollars, US dollars and so that's probably not how you pronounce your last name, but that is how you're supposed to pronounce your last name

KAYLA: Wow

SARAH: I'm me

KAYLA: You tell them

SARAH: I'm telling you that's how you're supposed to pronounce your last name, me, a person who's not even a native German speaker

KAYLA: Wow, get, got

SARAH: Anyway, thank you Emma

KAYLA: Yeah, thank you, sorry about your name I guess

Sorry about me mostly

Yeah

Our $5 patrons who are promoting Who We Are Promoting This Week are Jacob Weber, Jennifer Smart, Jessica Shea, Jolly Lizbert, and Julianne. Our $10 patrons who are promoting something this week are Cinnamon Toast Punch who would like to promote Rainy Wong with Friends and Swashing in the Puddles. David Jay who would like to promote Emergent Strategy by Adrienne Marie Brown, David Nurse who would like to promote. I just, I think metro systems are good, I like them, Derek and Karissa who would like to promote The Farm Upstate where Melody the Hamster is continuing to scheme to overthrow of heteronormativity and summoning a legion of other animals upon the farm to help with the cause.. Great work Melody, always, always doing good

KAYLA: I miss Melody already

SARAH: I miss Melody already. Melody died like three months ago

KAYLA: Don't say that on the podcast

SARAH: Melody is a very good Melody. Anyway, our other $10 patrons are Arcanus Allison. Allison told me what they want to promote so I will tell you. Arden Gray by Ray Stove. It's a coming of age YA book and the main character is an ace lesbian and her best friend is a trans mask and Allison read the entire book in one day, a trigger warning for abuse and some acephobia. But it handles the topics well and it doesn't feel like trauma porn. Which is good

KAYLA: Wow

SARAH: So check that out maybe, Arden Gray by Ray Stove. Stove, Stovey, Stove, Stove. Ari K, . Benjamin Ybbara, Cass, , Elle Bitter, myAunt Jeannie, Maggie, Kebba, Martin Chiesl, Mattie, Potater, Purple Hayes, Rosie Costello, Blairfoot, Backpacker, SongOfStorm, the Steve, Zirklteo, our $15 patrons are Andrew Hillum, who’d like to promote the invisible spectrum podcast, click4Caroline, who would like to promote Ace of Hearts, do you like Twitch.tv,/Melody, yeah. Action Mario, who likes to promote friends that are supportive, constructive, and happy cause of a better person, John, John, oh John. I don't think you answered me. John. Keziah Root, who would like to promote the people who come into your life just for a small time but just when you need them, we need Nathaniel White, who would like to promote Nathanieljwhitedesigns.com. Kayla’s aunt NIna, who would like to promote Katemaggartart.com, and Sarah Jones, who is @eternalloli everywhere. Our $20 patrons are Sabrina Hauck, Merry Christmas from your parents, and Dragonfly, who would like to promote. I thought of something about 30 seconds ago and I already forgot it

KAYLA: Aww

SARAH: Dragonfly, who would like to promote

KAYLA: Me going to bed

SARAH: Dragonfly, who would like to promote. It was conceptual

KAYLA; Isn't it always

SARAH: Jesus, Dragonfly who likes to promote remembering what we're doing

KAYLA: You know what, my juice is?

SARAH: What?

KAYLA: I'm going to see you

SARAH: That's true

KAYLA; I'm going to punch your face

SARAH: Oh, okay. With what?

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: With a fist?

KAYLA: Who’s to say?

SARAH: Oh, I have a gift for you

KAYLA: Oh, I don't have a gift for you

SARAH: You don't have to have a gift for me

KAYLA: No, I feel obligated

SARAH: No, don't give me a gift. What if I hate it? That would be embarrassing

KAYLA: I'm going to make sure I'm going to get something you would hate

SARAH: I'll punch you with it

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: Anyway. Dragonfly would like to promote Punching your neighborhood co-host with the nearest object. Thanks for listening. Tune in next Sunday for more rest in your ears and we will be together and punching each other live on the podcast

KAYLA: Yeah, it'll just be punching sounds over and over again, no talking

SARAH: Yep

KAYLA; Uh, okay, bye. You can't just

SARAH: No, the cows, Kayla. Jesus Christ

KAYLA; But you like, you can't, you just started saying other stuff in the middle. And it like threw off the flow

SARAH: Are we not supposed to take good care of our cows? I remember what Dragonfly’s would like to promote. Dragonfly would like to promote not having to edit the podcast right away after recording the podcast but except today. Dragonfly hypothetically has to

KAYLA: And until then, take good care of your cows

SARAH: Oh no.

(47:40)