Hey what's up hello! This week, we have some small talk about small talk. We've noticed that all too often, small talk topics turn to dating and romance, so we're here to come up with some new aspec friendly small talk topics!
Episode Transcript: www.soundsfakepod.com/transcripts/amatonormativity-in-small-talk
Donate: patreon.com/soundsfakepod
Follow: @soundsfakepod
Join: https://discord.gg/W7VBHMt
Buy our book: www.soundsfakepod.com/book
Hey what's up hello! This week, we have some small talk about small talk. We've noticed that all too often, small talk topics turn to dating and romance, so we're here to come up with some new aspec friendly small talk topics!
Episode Transcript: www.soundsfakepod.com/transcripts/amatonormativity-in-small-talk
Donate: patreon.com/soundsfakepod
Follow: @soundsfakepod
Join: https://discord.gg/W7VBHMt
Buy our book: www.soundsfakepod.com/book
(00:00)
SARAH: Hey, what's up, hello, welcome to Sounds Fake But Okay, a podcast where an aroace girl. I'm Sarah, that's me.
KAYLA: And a bi-demisexual girl, that's me, Kayla.
SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else we just don't understand.
KAYLA: On today's episode, small talk.
SARAH AND KAYLA: Sounds Fake But Okay.
(intro music)
SARAH: Welcome back to the pod!
KAYLA: Hello.
SARAH: We are here again, and you are there again.
KAYLA: How do we keep meeting like this? We have to stop.
SARAH: It’s crazy. But if we stop...
KAYLA: Don't stop listening
SARAH: then what would be the point?
KAYLA: Truly.
SARAH: And don't stop buying our book. SoundsFakePod.com/book.
KAYLA: (to the tune of Don’t Stop Believin’) Don’t stop. I saw a couple people say today that they got a notification from Barnes and Noble that their book would be arriving, I think, March 1st. Which is exciting, but also kind of sucks because you have to wait like a week.
SARAH: Yeah, Barnes and Noble.
KAYLA: Barnes And Noble. But maybe that's just an estimate, like maybe it would come sooner. Who's to say?
SARAH: I don't know. My contacts were supposed to arrive today because I have literally none left.
KAYLA: Oh
SARAH: And they were just like, yeah, you weren't here to sign off on it, so now it's just at a building and you have to come get it. We're not going to try again. And I'm like, girl, I run out of contacts tomorrow.
KAYLA: Are you going to be able to see the drive there?
SARAH: For context, I have daily contacts, so I could wear them more than one day, but it's not right.
KAYLA: She also has glasses. It's not the end of the world.
SARAH: I do have glasses.
KAYLA: She's fine.
SARAH: I might also have more if I dig enough, but not very many more.
KAYLA: Who’s to say?
SARAH: Okay, Kayla. In addition to people buying our book and showing up to our book event at The Strand on February 23rd.
KAYLA: Links should be in the description of this episode unless you're listening to this in the future and then it's not relevant anymore.
SARAH: Yeah, too bad. Sucks to be you. Other than that, what are we talking about this week?
KAYLA: This week, we're going to be talking about small talk. And specifically, we're going to be giving some ideas of new small talk, small talk topics. Wow, that's really hard. Say it
SARAH: That real Midwestern right there. Small talk topics.
KAYLA: That's hard. Small talk topics.
SARAH: Well, some people would say small talk topics. It would be the same noise.
KAYLA: Yeah if you are from Boston, I guess.
SARAH: I know, but depending on the accent, it would be the same noise. It's like the caught, caught.
KAYLA: Small talk topics.
SARAH: The caught, caught merger. Because we don't have the caught, caught merger. We pronounce them different. C-A-U-G-H-T versus C-O-T. We pronounce them differently.
KAYLA: Different.
SARAH: But some people do have that, and so I think some people would say, what were we even saying?
KAYLA: Small talk topics.
SARAH: (laughing) Small talk topics.
KAYLA: It's that my mouth can't go wide and then small that fast. Because it goes wide for the talk.
SARAH: Yeah, talk.
KAYLA: And skinny for the topics. Topics. Linguists. Anyway. I know we have linguists listening.
SARAH: Do. Please tell us what accents they already say. No, no, no. I was going to say what accents say talk and topics the same.
KAYLA: I was going to say they already told us what our accents are, and I have a note saved in my phone of what my accent is. Because it's a fun fact. And it's confusing.
SARAH: And they were just like, Sarah, you're fucking basic.
KAYLA: Yeah, they're like, Sarah, you're normal Kayla –
SARAH: You're not special.
KAYLA: Something is going on in there. Anyway, Sarah, why did you bring this topic to me?
SARAH: All day, neither of us had any ideas.
KAYLA: To be fair, I told my roommates I didn't have any ideas, and they did take a large, not a large. They took some time out of their day to sit and tell me ideas, and some of them were actually quite good.
SARAH: Nice. Maybe we'll use them in the future
KAYLA: Who’s to say.
SARAH: And then I got home, and I was in my bathroom, and I had this idea. And then I wrote it down because I was afraid I was going to forget. Just like, it was going to be like two minutes between that and getting on here with Kayla, and I was like, what if I forget?
KAYLA: Anything could happen.
SARAH: So I wrote it down. And now we're doing it.
KAYLA: Okay, but you never explained it.
SARAH: Yeah, because I didn't. It just came to me. There was nothing that spurred it. It was simply, I was just living my life.
KAYLA: Yes, no, but. Okay, so we said that we're going to be talking about small talk topics.
SARAH: Oh, I see what you want me to say. I see what you're leading me towards.
(05:00)
KAYLA: Yeah, thank you.
SARAH: Okay, we got there eventually.
KAYLA: Their chemistry. It's just like, how do they do it?
SARAH: Crazy. I feel like so much small talk, and now I'm thinking about how I pronounce talk.
KAYLA: I'm sorry.
SARAH: Especially in the workplace, where you're not going to have any spicy, nothing crazy.
KAYLA: Well, I don't know. Me and my coworkers really get into it.
SARAH: My coworker that is closest in age to me is 13 years older than me.
KAYLA: That's fair. It depends on the culture.
SARAH: It does. The other day I said something and she was like, are you okay? And I was like, oh no, that was just like, millennial.
KAYLA: And you were like, no, but also.
SARAH: I made a joke about not having brain cells, and she was like, are you okay? And I was like, oh yeah, sometimes I forget that you're like…
KAYLA: Old
SARAH: older end of millennial.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: And so you get a lot of the things, but you don't quite get all of them. Anyway, a lot of the small talk topics that are standard have to do with relationships and relationships that are assumed to be romantic, sexual. Are you dating? That sort of thing. And I never have anything to contribute in those conversations, and also it kind of forces you to come out or lie.
KAYLA: Mhm
SARAH: Those are your options if you're not into dating or if you date differently or whatever. So you either have to just lie to people.
KAYLA: It's like the amatonormativity of small talk.
SARAH: Yeah. Correct. And so I said, let's be silly
KAYLA: Mhm
SARAH: and come up with some small talk topics.
KAYLA: Before we be silly
SARAH: Yeah?
KAYLA: can we be serious about this topic for a second?
SARAH: Sure.
KAYLA: Because I'm curious. So one of the other ideas that my roommates came up with was about being aspec in the workplace and whether that hinders you from getting promotions more or you're seen differently, whatever. I think that could be a good episode, like a whole episode in the future. So we can come back to that if people are interested.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: But I am just interested how often this happens to you.
SARAH: Me personally?
KAYLA: Yeah, that you are left out of small talk.
SARAH: I mean, everyone at my workplace now is painfully aware.
KAYLA: (laughing) Yes. They must be.
SARAH: Painfully, I say because they're very supportive and my boss keeps being like, when's your book going to come? And I'm like, girl, I don't even have my copy yet.
KAYLA: Who’s to say, (bleep)? Shouldn't say his name. Bleep that out.
SARAH: Anyway, so I feel like it hasn't really happened recently. And I feel like just the way I am as a person, I'm also not inclined to really insert myself in, especially because I'm the lowest ranking person in basically every meeting I'm in.
KAYLA: Yes. And just the youngest.
SARAH: Yeah, I’m definitely the youngest. And so I am not want to insert myself where I don't feel very comfortable being. So it's also just like me not jumping in. But I also, you know, when it is talking about like relationships or whatever, like I just, I don't have anything to contribute. Like recently in a meeting, we were talking about how my one coworker who is closest in age to me is going to turn 40, not this year, but next year. And she's like having a little bit of an existential crisis about it.
KAYLA: (laughing) Good
SARAH: And like everyone is talking about like, oh, like when I turned 40, whatever. And my one boss was like, oh, yeah, when I turned 40, 25 years ago, and I was like
KAYLA: Jesus Christ
SARAH: Yeah, I'm 25. When you turned 40, when I was born
KAYLA: Jesus
SARAH: I was like, I have nothing to contribute to this conversation. And a lot of times it just feels like that.
KAYLA: Yeah, I'm even thinking because now that I am thinking about it, so many of my discussions at work and like we get deeper because it's a bunch of women my age
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: and we're all very comfortable with each other. So we definitely overshare.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: But so many of the topics are people's dating lives and stuff, which is also weird because two people on my team, like my boss and one other person are millennials/Gen X and have kids. And then there's two people who are like, I guess, younger millennials who are like dating. And then there's me, the youngest, in like a long term relationship. So it's just like a very weird dynamic
(10:00)
KAYLA: because dating and stuff does come up so often. But even I will feel left out of that. Like I love listening to it.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: I love hearing a gossip, but I have nothing to contribute. And I feel like often my married coworkers don't either because it's like there's not fun drama. It's just them having kids.
SARAH: Yeah, exactly. And like at my previous job where there were more young people, like I think I've told this on the pod before, but like how one of my coworkers like had a date and he was like he wanted to like ask not like for advice, but like he wanted to like… he wanted, I guess he was kind of for advice like he wanted to ask for advice from from the people there. And he realized that of the people there, there was one who had been in a five year long relationship, one who was poly and had two partners, and then there was me.
KAYLA: (laughing) Interesting group
SARAH: and he was like he was like none of you like I can't commiserate with any of you about like if this date sucks or like how much dating like is annoying like rest of us are like I don't know. KAYLA: You're like that's I'll listen, but I can't tell you anything.
SARAH: Sucks to be you. I don't know.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: I was also recently at a party.
KAYLA: Ooh, la la.
SARAH: With the same person actually. And I saw one of my people that I used to work with who now is in a queer relationship. We have to stan.
KAYLA: Love
SARAH: My one friend was like, did we did we know she was queer? And I was like, I don't know. Who knows? I don't. Does anyone know anything? But like there was, you know, discussion about relationships and like I think I said on more than one occasion. Like, wow, I'm just so glad I don't do that. Because.
KAYLA: Yeah, it's a stressful time.
SARAH: I was just like and it's interesting to hear about. But also then it's like I don't have a way to contribute to it, although it was really interesting. I did end up talking to a stranger at one point, which was not what I wanted.
KAYLA: Yeah, that's big for you.
SARAH: Not what I wanted. I got kind of cornered into it. But there were two of them and they knew what demisexuality was.
KAYLA: That's impressive. Also, mostly unrelated, demisexuality is now like officially in the dictionary.
SARAH: Slay
KAYLA: My friend sent me – That's exactly what I said. My friend sent me a clip from like Seth Meyers of him being like, oh, they added all these queer words to the dictionary, including demisexual. My friend sent me that clip and I texted back and I said, slay
SARAH: slay. I lost. Sorry. What was happening?
KAYLA: Strangers, they cornered you and they knew what demisexual.
SARAH: Oh, they knew what demisexuality was because –
KAYLA: they had read my BBC article.
SARAH: They had read that book that started out as Reylo fan fiction.
KAYLA: Yes, the Love Hypothesis. Someone is demisexual in that.
SARAH: Yes. And so they knew what that was.
KAYLA: Representation, imagine.
SARAH: Representation, crazy. And then I suggested Loveless by Alice Oseman.
KAYLA: Of course.
SARAH: I think they wrote it down.
KAYLA; Very important. That's so exciting.
SARAH: Spreading the good word. This is how I evangelize.
KAYLA: Good.
SARAH: So you just often find that like, because you're in a long term relationship, you don't have a ton to contribute?
KAYLA: I would say it's two things. I would say it's both of them in a long term relationship. So I'm not like actively dating, feeling the woes of like modern dating. And also not that it's often that we talk about people's hookups and stuff because we try to draw the line. Yeah, we try to be good about it. But if that kind of stuff ever does come up, again, I find it very interesting. Like I don't mind hearing about it, but I again have like nothing to contribute. I don't even have old stories or something I could tell.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: So it doesn't so much. I wouldn't say it really bothers me. It would probably bother me more if I was also actively dating and like couldn't commiserate in that way.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: But I do find that like I just, you know, being demisexual, I walk that kind of middle line of like I can really relate in some ways. And then others, it's just like, I don't know.
SARAH: Yeah. Who can relate?
KAYLA: Not me. Yeah. It's also – I'm sure because neither of us are sex or romance repulsed.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: So that would obviously make it a lot harder because we can say as much as we want, like, oh, we don't relate or, you know, it just gets kind of annoying to be left out, that kind of thing. But it's a whole other level if you're truly uncomfortable with it.
SARAH: Yeah. It's time to get silly.
KAYLA: Yeah. I just thought maybe we should actually try to have a conversation before we got silly, but now it's time to be silly.
SARAH: No you’re right. Now it's time to be silly.
KAYLA: So if you only come here for serious things, first of all, what you doing?
(15:00)
KAYLA: Second of all, now you can leave.
SARAH: (laughing) Bye. Okay. I feel like there's like basics. Right?
KAYLA: Weather.
SARAH: There's like, yeah, like, oh, the crazy weather we're having.
KAYLA: What you're watching.
SARAH: What you're watching.
KAYLA: Read anything good lately.
SARAH: In my industry, you get asked that all the time and I always say.
KAYLA: And you like need a good answer too. Like they judge you probably, right?
SARAH: Uh huh.
KAYLA: I hate that.
SARAH: I get asked that question constantly and I never have an answer.
KAYLA: Just be like, BTS compilations on YouTube. What of it?
SARAH: But my boss isn't like…
KAYLA: Cool?
SARAH: He's not like, well, he's not like, oh yeah, that's helpful to your career.
KAYLA: It could be. Maybe one day you'll work on like a BTS documentary or something.
SARAH: That would be delightful. But you've got the classics
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: and you've got the like, oh, like what are your hobbies? What do you do for fun?
KAYLA: It's bad that my mind immediately goes to like, how's the wife and kids? Cause that's exactly what we're talking about not doing. Cause that is immediately where you go.
SARAH: And I think also another great one, a Hank Green classic. What's your favorite bridge?
KAYLA: What?
SARAH: What's your favorite bridge?
KAYLA: Okay. I know we have had this conversation before. You're the only person who's ever asked me that. So like that's not a-
SARAH: Yeah, cause no one does it.
KAYLA: You said it was a standard. It's not.
SARAH: It was just, it's, it's a Hank Green thing.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: It is standard for Hank Green.
KAYLA: Here's a throwback. I was listening to an old episode the other day cause I was editing a transcript. And do you remember that someone like met Hank Green at PodCon and asked him to shout us out? And he was like, oh yeah. But he sound, he said our name was sound is fake, but okay. When he like repeated it.
SARAH: I have literally no recollection of that whatsoever.
KAYLA: Me either. But during the episode, we were both like freaking out about it. And then I immediately forgot.
SARAH: That's wild that we both straight up forgot.
KAYLA: Cause you think you wouldn't.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Anyway. But it was like episode 70 maybe?
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: It's been a long time.
SARAH: Wild.
KAYLA: Anyway.
SARAH: Okay.
KAYLA: Strange the passage of time.
SARAH: Strange the passage of time.
KAYLA: Do you have ideas? Did you write down anything?
SARAH: I wrote down exactly three things.
KAYLA: Okay. I have zero as usual, but also Sarah told me this idea right before, so.
SARAH: I came up with this idea about five minutes before I told you.
KAYLA: I know.
SARAH: This is a crucial, crucial question.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Who's your BTS bias?
KAYLA: Is that really classified as small talk?
SARAH: (laughing) What do you mean?
KAYLA: Cause I feel like for you, that's a deep question that could turn into like. Cause to me, okay. Maybe we should look up a definition of small talk. Because to me, small talk is like, you can answer like real quick and then you're like done. It doesn't turn into like a deep.
SARAH: I can answer real quick, Yoongi.
KAYLA: You can. But okay. So say you asked me that and I then answered and I said, Jimin, cause that's one of them. I know their names.
SARAH: Good job.
KAYLA: Would you not want to ask me any follow-up questions?
SARAH: But it would be a great way to get to know each other. And if you said, I hate BTS. I think that shit's stupid. Then I would know to never speak to you again.
KAYLA: That's fair.
SARAH: At least be open-minded about it, y'all. Please
KAYLA: A polite conversation about unimportant or uncontroversial matters, especially as engaged in on social occasions. So I'm just saying that is important to you. So.
SARAH: Incredible small talk conversation. Do you think BTS should have been exempted from the Korean military?
KAYLA: Oh Lord. I will say when I looked up small talk.
SARAH: Non-political and.
KAYLA: So many articles came up with like ideas for small talk. Tragic. I'm going to come up with an idea now.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: And my idea is what's your favorite season?
SARAH: Fall.
KAYLA: I think mine is also fall.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: We're having great small talk right now.
SARAH: Anyone who says winter is from somewhere warm.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Or they really like like skiing or snowboarding or something.
KAYLA: Yeah. Yes.
SARAH: My phone keeps falling asleep, if you were forced to hang out for a day with your sworn enemy.
KAYLA: Oh
SARAH: what activities would you plan? Now.
KAYLA: That's a really good question.
SARAH: Cause cause also it brings up the question of do you have a sworn enemy? So is it, is it a theoretical thing?
KAYLA; Right.
SARAH: Or, or is it like, or is it like, I'm going to have to spend a fucking day with Ellen DeGeneres, you know?
KAYLA: Oh, the Ellen show was an answer
(20:00)
KAYLA: on the crossword the other day.
SARAH: Oh no
KAYLA: We were all very sad about it.
SARAH: You know a fun fact that my sister has told me multiple times?
KAYLA: Mhm?
SARAH: The most commonly used word in the New York times crossword puzzle is Oreo.
KAYLA: I've been doing the crossword for several weeks now. Haven't seen it.
SARAH: Well, my sister's told me that fact more than once.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: So it has to be true.
KAYLA: Well, I do have a sworn enemy. It is not Ellen DeGeneres. I will not say who it is, but now I'm trying to think of what activities I would plan.
SARAH: Who is it?
KAYLA: (bleep)
SARAH: Ah, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
KAYLA: Wait, can you leave that in and just bleep out?
SARAH: The whole thing?
KAYLA: Yeah. What activities would I plan?
SARAH: My first gut instinct is to say like ziplining. Or like something.
KAYLA: But then you cut the cord.
SARAH: Wow, that is dark.
KAYLA: Sabotage. Oh, I thought that was the point.
SARAH: Well, I was just going to say like zipline is something that like a lot of people might
be like scared of heights or whatever. But I would love ziplining. So like, you know, it would be...
KAYLA: I thought the whole point was to do something like murderous.
SARAH: Oh, that's absolutely an option.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: I saw a video yesterday of a girl who was like, she thought she was about to go ziplining, but then it was one of those things where you get like dropped and then you like...
KAYLA: No, no, no.
SARAH: And she like thought she was going to die.
KAYLA: Yeah, me too.
SARAH: And I was like, that's so mean.
KAYLA: That's really mean. Because here's the thing. I would go skydiving far before I went bungee jumping.
SARAH: Oh yeah, I won't bungee jump. I think we've talked about this on the podcast.
KAYLA: Bungee jumping to me seems way more dangerous.
SARAH: I've said it before. I'll say it again. I'm afraid my back's just going to break in half.
KAYLA: That's a good fear.
SARAH: The front half of my body is just going to end up on the ground and then my legs will
still be attached.
KAYLA: I just, I don't know what it is. Because I know you're jumping from less high so that there isn't as much force.
SARAH: Yeah. And also with some bungee.
KAYLA: Maybe it's just because it happens so much faster – oh you're frozen? That's good.
SARAH: That was a hundred percent my fault too. Kayla's frozen.
KAYLA: She's frozen.
SARAH: My light flickered.
KAYLA: (vaguely British accent) What's happening?
SARAH: (vaguely singing) Oh no. I'm going to leave and come back.
KAYLA: (still in a vaguely British accent) What is it?
SARAH: Assign and leave.
KAYLA: Hello
SARAH: Hi, there was a power surge in my house.
KAYLA: I love that.
SARAH: And I was trying to reconnect and like my roommate, Kayla, you know.
KAYLA: I know her.
SARAH: She's stuck her head like in the door and was like, Sarah, was there just a power surge or am I hallucinating?
KAYLA: Good.
SARAHI didn't stop recording.
KAYLA:I didn't either.
SARAH: Okay, good.
KAYLA: There's a lot of me talking in a British accent.
SARAH: I look forward to hearing it.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Okay.
KAYLA: Anyway, I have no idea where we were.
SARAH: I don't either.
KAYLA: I do know that- Oh, bungee jumping.
SARAH: Bungee jumping.
KAYLA: Oh, what would you do with your enemy?
SARAH: I would definitely do something like treacherous and then I would conspire. Oh, you know what I would do? I would do, I guess similar to zip lining, but one of those like really high ropes courses where you're like, but like an intense one over like the Grand Canyon or something. And then I would conspire with the people and there would be an accident.
SARAH: Wow. You're really feeling like homicide is up your alley.
KAYLA: It is my sworn enemy.
SARAH: That's fair.
KAYLA: I don't know what you want.
SARAH: Now, see, I don't really have a sworn enemy.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: Like I'm just not the enemy type.
KAYLA: No, you aren't.
SARAH: So like for me, I'm really more just thinking of a hypothetical person. So I'm like, okay, what if we do all of their favorite things and then they fall in love with me and then I break their heart?
KAYLA: Okay. That's still, I don't see how you're judging me. I don't see how you're judging me.
SARAH: The long game
KAYLA: Okay. But what if, okay, you wouldn't because you're Aroace. But what if then you accidentally fell in love with them? Enemies to lovers.
SARAH: That would be an incredible fan fiction.
KAYLA: It has to be somewhere, right? Someone's definitely done that.
SARAH: Oh, definitely. Absolutely. Are you kidding? That's probably a whole tag on A03.
KAYLA: Probably. Small talk topic. What is your favorite fan fiction?
(silence)
KAYLA: That's it.
SARAH: Oh, that's it?
(laughter)
SARAH: It's actually funny that you… It's actually funny that you say that though because when I was in, when I thought of this idea and I was just in my bathroom just thinking, one of the things that I thought of that
(25:00)
SARAH: but I didn't write down was, do you read fan fiction? And if so, on what website? Because I think the platform you read it on says a lot about a person.
KAYLA: That's true. I was going to say, what's your favorite fanfic trope? But then I realized that the more socially acceptable answer, especially if you're talking to people older than you, would be like, what's your favorite… just fiction trope?
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: But then my brain stopped.
SARAH: Yeah. I, for a second, thought you had frozen again.
KAYLA: (laughing) I was having a lot of thoughts.
SARAH: (laughing) I really thought Kayla froze again.
KAYLA: I'm really tired. Anyway, that's… Sarah, what's your favorite fan fiction?
SARAH: I can't answer that. I don't know.
KAYLA: My favorite fan fiction is the one where it's Harry Potter, but it's Christian and no one's sure if it's a parody or not…
SARAH: Hogwarts school school of prayer and miracles.
KAYLA: I wrote an entire paper on that fan fiction in school because it's just so crazy.
SARAH: My favorite fan fiction is my own, not because it's my own, but because people validate me.
KAYLA: Yeah. Do you still write fan fiction?
SARAH: (whispering) Don't worry about it.
KAYLA: Huh? What?
SARAH: Oh, did you not hear me?
KAYLA: No.
SARAH: I said, don't worry about it.
KAYLA: Okay. But what do you even...
SARAH: Don't worry about it.
KAYLA: I'm trying to think of what you would write it about.
SARAH: What is your favorite cold-blooded animal? And then, this is also good because I don't know a lot of cold-blooded animals off the top of my head.
KAYLA: Me either.
SARAH: So it's something that you can...
KAYLA: Is a toad?
SARAH: I think so. But it's something that you can learn together. You can explore together.
KAYLA: That's true. That toad that looks really grumpy.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: That one.
SARAH: My instinct is to say lizard.
KAYLA: That was my first one too, but it feels so… broad.
SARAH: What's that big lizard?
KAYLA: Chameleon, bearded dragon.
SARAH: I was thinking of chameleon, which are not big
KAYLA: Wow
SARAH: but my brain was like chimichanga chupacabra.
KAYLA: Nope. Close.
SARAH: That's what my brain was giving me.
KAYLA: Oh, what medication are you on?
SARAH: So good. Oh my god. I recently had to bring my friend to the hospital again.
KAYLA: Love.
SARAH: Afterwards, we went to CVS to get the prescriptions that he had been prescribed for his illness. He's fine.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: He also had other prescriptions ready that he didn't realize.
KAYLA: Wow. Meal prep. Grocery shopping.
SARAH: They were like, so here's this one, and I was like, oh my god, do you take that too?
KAYLA: I take that. I love comparing medication.
SARAH: It's so fun.
KAYLA: The other day on the beat I was filling, I got a new, I'll show you. By you I mean Sarah. And then you all can hear it. Got a new pill case.
SARAH: Oh wow.
(pill bottle shaking)
KAYLA: That's the sound of my pills and my vitamins. Anyway, I was filling it.
SARAH: I didn’t hear it
KAYLA: You didn't hear it?
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: My recording definitely got it.
SARAH: Okay.
KAYLA: And then the BeReal went off, so I took a picture and my friend commented and said, meal prep.
SARAH: Meal prep.
KAYLA: And it was very funny. Anyway, I'm on Prozac and I recently started taking a women's multivitamin, but it's really big. I should have gotten the gummy ones. I really messed up.
SARAH: Do you only take Prozac?
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: Oh my god.
KAYLA: But TBD, I'm starting my brain testing this month
SARAH: Oh my god
KAYLA: so anything could happen.
SARAH: Now I want to get brain testing just to see what's out there.
KAYLA: I'm unbelievably excited. See what's out there. My intake appointment is next week and then I'll do my big test. Who knows when, but a hot new illness might enter the villa. Who's to say?
SARAH: Might enter the villa. How exciting.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: And whether that contributes to the meal prep or not, you never know.
KAYLA: Anyone's guess.
SARAH: It may or may not, but it'll be in the villa.
KAYLA: She'll be there.
SARAH: I ran out of things that I thought of.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: I think a good topic is, do you think Pluto is a planet?
KAYLA: That's really good. Yeah.
SARAH: Yeah. The other one is, so the rainbow, ROYGBIV, IV being indigo and violet
KAYLA: Hate that
SARAH: do you think indigo and violet are actually different colors?
KAYLA: No.
SARAH: In the context of, I know if you want to talk about color theory, whatever, but I mean – I guess they technically are different colors, but not in the rainbow.
KAYLA: Not in the rainbow. When have you ever seen a rainbow and been able to tell those apart?
SARAH: I mean, half the time you don't even see purple in a rainbow.
(30:00)
KAYLA: I haven't seen a rainbow in a really long time.
SARAH: Maybe you should look harder.
KAYLA: Oh… Okay.
SARAH: Have you thought about that?
KAYLA: No. I'm missing-
SARAH: Rookie mistake.
KAYLA: Now that I haven't seen a rainbow in a long time, it makes me think about, rainbows are pretty crazy.
SARAH: It's a double rainbow.
KAYLA: Small talk. When's the last time you saw a rainbow?
SARAH: Small talk. What is your, what's the month thing?
KAYLA: (laughing) Zodiac sign
SARAH: The month thing where you have a, I'm a Libra. Yes. I can never remember the name of-
KAYLA: Here's the problem with that one though, is I feel like that's become a pick-up line.
SARAH: It can get political.
KAYLA: Yes. Yes, it can become political. But I feel like it is a pick-up line now that girls use, but a lot of guys get really annoyed with it.
SARAH: Ew.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: See, but if it were me, I would ask and they would be like, whatever. And I would be like, cool.
KAYLA: That's, yeah.
SARAH: Like I don't know anything else.
KAYLA: Why would you ask?
SARAH: (laughing) I don't know.
KAYLA: All right.
SARAH: I think a good, I thought of something I'm saying. Just play two truths in a lie with them.
KAYLA: That's fun.
SARAH: Or two lies in a truth.
KAYLA: Oh. I really like doing the, if you could be a vending machine for anything, what would you be a vending machine for?
SARAH: Cherry Coke.
KAYLA: Really?
SARAH: Everyone deserves access.
KAYLA: Really? Out of everything in the world?
SARAH: No, that is, that is, that is like a standard vending machine thing. So we're talking like not food and drinks. Photocards. BTS photocards.
KAYLA: Okay. Alright.
SARAH: They do actually have like machines that they have at like places. Probably not actually. I'm not like a photocard collector in the way that a lot of people are. Like little plants. Like in a little pot. Yeah. I think that'd be nice.
KAYLA: I think I would do...
SARAH: What would you vend?
KAYLA: Like a seashell.
SARAH: Like big or small?
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Yeah. Okay. Cool.
KAYLA: Mhm. What if you were a vending machine for quarters? So you just put a quarter in, it comes right back out.
SARAH: (laughing) Sometimes they do work like that.
KAYLA: Quarter swap. What if you want a new quarter?
SARAH: Quarter swap.
KAYLA: Switch it up a little bit.
SARAH: You're like a collector and you're trying to like collect all the states or something.
KAYLA: True.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: That's a good idea actually.
SARAH: I also think a fun thing to be would be a vending machine for sand. No one would like it.
KAYLA: Nope. I hate it.
SARAH: And it would be useless.
KAYLA: I hate that.
SARAH: Just sand.
KAYLA: I have a question. I have one.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: What is, these are just turning into like conversation starter questions. I guess that is what small talk is.
SARAH: That's what small talk is.
KAYLA: What is your favorite flavor of like hoodie? Is it a hoodie with a hood? Is it a crew neck? No hood. A quarter zip? A full zip? Those are all the versions I can, cowl neck.
SARAH: Cowl neck. I think for wearing like out and about day to day crew neck, but for like pure comfort, I'm at my house, I'm vibing hoodie. I'm wearing one right now.
KAYLA: I think my answer is always crew neck. I have come to really dislike hoodies. It is on my neck too much.
SARAH: I have acquired more recently. One of which because my grandfather died.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: And I took it from his closet.
KAYLA: I just don't like how much they, I feel like they choke me. I have a, I had a sweatshirt that I liked and I never wore it because I had a hood on it. So I cut it off, wear it all the time.
SARAH: Yeah. No, sometimes, sometimes if the, if the neck isn't right, it can feel like it's choking me.
KAYLA: I'm actually wearing a hoodie right now, and it's fine. It's a cropped hoodie.
SARAH: That's like a light material though.
KAYLA: Yeah. It's a light material and like the hood is small. Like I don't actually, I guess I could wear it, but it's like not. It's for decoration really, which is fine with me.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: There's always that classic question of if you could jump into a pool of
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: something that's not water, what would you jump into? But that's basic. We don't want basic. We're going to do something else.
KAYLA: Well now I'm thinking about my answer.
SARAH: Jello.
KAYLA: Jello is pretty good. Ranch.
SARAH: Oh, did you, okay. I sent you a – I know I send you a lot of videos
KAYLA: Probably didn't see it. Probably didn't see it.
SARAH: Every time I send you a video, I'm like, she's not going to see it.
KAYLA: (laughing) I admire your tenacity though. Beause one day maybe I'll watch them.
SARAH: Well, here's the thing though. It's like, I, it's, it's like a compulsion. I have to do it.
KAYLA: You have to. I understand.
SARAH: And so like, even if I know you're not going to watch it, no, but there was one
(35:00)
SARAH: They make you know, like cheese in a can?
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: They make ranch in a can.
KAYLA: What? I should start watching these videos you sent me.
SARAH: I sent it, I sent it like earlier today. Like it would be easy to find.
KAYLA: I can find it.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: I told you about the Big Boy ranch, right?
SARAH: It actually might be the, yeah, you did. It actually might be the most recent one that I sent you.
KAYLA: Okay. Maybe I'll look at it, but probably not.
SARAH: (laughing) Okay.
KAYLA: oh, what is your favorite like rule of paper? College ruled? Wide ruled? Dots? Grid?
SARAH: I think this could get political.
KAYLA: Yeah, probably. I like a dot or a college rule. It depends on what I'm doing.
SARAH: College ruled or a grid. And the grid is always college ruled.
KAYLA: Grid is too confining for me, I think.
SARAH: Oh, interesting. Sometimes I just ignore it.
KAYLA: If I'm writing, I will do a college rule. If I'm like, like my planner is in dots, I think.
SARAH: Mine is in a grid.
KAYLA: I hate that.
SARAH: Because I, because I like used it, it started out sort of as a bullet journal and it's, it's evolved over time
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: but that is the way that I use it. And I also used grid paper for all of my math classes. It's a good thing to use it for.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: But yeah, wide ruled paper is for heathens. Sorry to say it.
KAYLA: I hate it. It's for children with no finger dexterity.
SARAH: Yeah. No, no fine motor skills.
KAYLA: Thank you. That's the word.
SARAH: My mother.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: I know everything because of my mother.
KAYLA: Okay. Who's your favorite mom? Could be easy unless you have more than one.
SARAH: I know someone who has four.
KAYLA: That's tough.
SARAH: And by that I mean my sister knows someone who has four.
KAYLA: Okay. Good.
SARAH: Because they had two moms. Moms got divorced.
KAYLA: Two more moms.
SARAH: They both got remarried.
KAYLA: That's pretty crazy.
SARAH: I have another one.
KAYLA: What type of shampoo do you use? If it's more than one in one, then it will become political.
SARAH: That's true. That's very true.
KAYLA: Yeah. Stage an intervention. I use We Dad.
SARAH: I use the Dove Unscented because when I was a youth, I was told that I should not use scented things because my skin is super sensitive. And I feel like at this point, for body wash, I still really need unscented.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: I can wear scented lotion, but if I'm actually trying to properly moisturize I'm holding it up right now.
KAYLA: I do love it. I do enjoy an Aveeno
SARAH: For shampoo and stuff, I probably could use scented stuff, but I've been using the same stuff forever, so wow, nice right now.
KAYLA: Now you know.
SARAH: If you could clone your childhood pet, would you?
KAYLA: No.
SARAH: Me neither.
KAYLA: I would feel really weird about it. There's this lady that sometimes I see on TikTok who has a clone of her cat.
SARAH: What?
KAYLA: She had a cat and then it died and somehow it's a clone. I don't quite understand how it works. I don't like it.
SARAH: Sounds dystopian.
KAYLA: If you could teach your pet how to talk with buttons, would you? Because now that dog is on Prozac. Bunny, the talking dog?
SARAH: Oh, yeah.
KAYLA: On my medicine because she knew too much of the world now and she got sad.
SARAH: She knew too much. My cousins have their dog talks a little bit like that.
KAYLA: Hm. If you could ethically have any wild animal as a pet and it would be like everything would be fine, what animal would you do?
SARAH: Why is my brain telling me grizzly bear?
KAYLA: Mine said giraffe.
SARAH: I think a grizzly bear could be cuddly.
KAYLA: If it was nice, yeah.
SARAH: Or like a big cat, I think too.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: What about like a big seal?
KAYLA: Nah, no.
SARAH: Yeah that makes sense
KAYLA: What am I supposed to do with that? Look at it?
SARAH: I don't know. I'm not a water person.
KAYLA: Unless I had like a large water area to like swim with it. Then no.
SARAH: Yeah. I think just like a cuddly, fuzzy, fuzzily bear.
KAYLA: I would say a koala, but I think they're supposed to be mean. Red panda! Cute.
SARAH: Yeah, that would be fun. If you would –
KAYLA: Huh?!
(background noise)
KAYLA: Sorry
SARAH: If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what food would it be?
(40:00)
KAYLA: Chipotle.
SARAH: That's not a food. That’s a –
KAYLA: Chipotle steak bowl.
SARAH: Store.
KAYLA: Chipotle steak bowl with white rice, black beans, pico de gallo, cheese, lettuce, guac, sour cream. I think that's everything.
SARAH: My brain was like, that's more than one food, but that's just me being-
KAYLA: I mean, it's more than one ingredient.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: What is a salad more than one food?
SARAH: To me, because I eat all of my things separate, my brain's like, that's not one food.
KAYLA: So Sarah is coming to stay in my house for a bit when she comes to the East Coast for our event. And my roommates were asking, oh, does Sarah have any, I don't know, anything she needs to be comfortable or whatever. And we were like, well, she is very picky. So I don't know what the meal plans are going to be for that week because we do have family dinner every night. So we'll see.
SARAH: Oh, man.
KAYLA: What happened?
SARAH: You know what happened to me just yesterday?
KAYLA: I don't.
SARAH: My roommate recently acquired, it's like strawberry cream, Dr. Pepper or something like that.
KAYLA: I've seen it. I hate it.
SARAH: Yeah. And she acquired it and her friend was briefly over at our abode and I mentioned something because he was drinking one. And he was like, oh, have you tried it? And I was like, no. And my roommate says the thing to know about Sarah and her eating is she pauses and she goes, she's very white.
(laughter)
SARAH: Mind you, this is two non-white people.
KAYLA: It's true.
SARAH: And I was like, this is true. I was like, I kind of eat like a five year old.
KAYLA: Yes you do
SARAH: And Kyla was like, Kyla was like, she's very self-aware and I admire that.
KAYLA: You eat pork chop, chicken, carrot, broccoli, buttered noodle
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: deconstructed Taco Bell taco, one singular Jimmy John sandwich, goldfish bitten in half.
SARAH: The horrifying thing.
KAYLA: Pretzel? Weird, I think.
SARAH: Of all of the things you just named, I have eaten 75% of them in the past week.
KAYLA: Chicken tender.
SARAH: I've eaten that in the past week.
KAYLA: Chipotle taco, also weird somehow. Sometimes it comes out to cheaper because of that.
SARAH: It hasn't recently. They've been overcharging me. I have eaten that in the past week.
KAYLA: Yeah. You got KFC the other day. I'm assuming it was like a fried chicken.
SARAH: Yes.
KAYLA: Ah. To be known.
SARAH: To be known. That's why I don't tell people.
KAYLA: Too bad, now they know.
SARAH: Wow. Yeah. Last question is, small talk, what is the most embarrassing thing about you that you don't ever tell anyone?
KAYLA: That is not true.
SARAH: No, it's not. No, but also just like, it's a good small talk question. See what you can get out of them, you know?
KAYLA: That's true. Yeah, that's true.
SARAH: But the thing with that is you have to offer something equally as good or else they won't give you anything.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Or something that they perceive to be equally as good, even if you don't care that much.
KAYLA: Yeah, that's true.
SARAH: If you were a traffic cone, why?
KAYLA: Because?
SARAH: Good talk. What's our poll for this week?
KAYLA: What are some… alternate? Well, okay. Should we do it open-ended or should we ask which one is best?
SARAH: I think we can do both.
KAYLA: That's so much work for me.
SARAH: Well, I'm gonna have to edit this whole podcast. Struggle in life.
KAYLA: Okay. Alright. I have to write it down or else it won't happen and even then it might not happen.
SARAH: So, options?
KAYLA: Oh, yeah. Yep.
SARAH: What did we say? Enemy. Enemy.
KAYLA: I don't know that I can write out that whole thing, though. I guess I could.
SARAH: Enemy playdate.
KAYLA: Enemy playdate. Okay. Vending machine.
SARAH: Vending machine. Animal as pet. And do you have the caught-caught merger?
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: Which is not something we discussed in the context of this, but...
KAYLA: Here we are.
(45:00)
SARAH: Tell me about your accent.
KAYLA: Yep.
SARAH: Great. And then you can also give us some of your favorite ideas if you want. Kayla, what's your beef and your juice this week?
KAYLA: My beef is that… It was a long weekend and so it made coming back to work very sad. And I did not want to do it. And my juice is that I had a successful Target trip today. I got some WD-40 so my bedroom door doesn't squeak.
SARAH: (squeaking door imitation)
KAYLA: You could be the furthest point away in the house and you could hear someone opening our door.
SARAH: (squeaking door imitation)
KAYLA: It was awful. But I fixed that. And then I also got a really cute shelf from the children's section. Because the children's section of Target, like the furniture, really goes off. I got a shelf for my bathroom because there's no storage and I hate my bathroom.
SARAH: Cool. Yeah. Did you do a beef?
KAYLA: Yep.
SARAH: Oh, I already forgot.
KAYLA: Good. Yeah, here we go.
SARAH: My juice is…
KAYLA: Oh here we go. I'm going to sit back. I'll be back here.
SARAH: All of the BTS members are just collecting luxury brands like Infinity Stones. We've got Louis Vuitton, we've got Dior, we've got Valentino. We're just going through them. Each one of them is just grabbing one, you know? My beef. I considered not doing all of this, but I wrote it all out. I got to commit to it. My beef is that my great new passion is why the price of stamps is going up so quickly. The price of stamps is about to increase to 63 cents, on the day this podcast releases, in the United States of America. A standard first class postage stamp will be 63 cents. Just a few years ago in 2016 when Kayla and I had already met. Only one year before the founding of this pod, stamps were 47 cents.
KAYLA: That's fast.
SARAH: And I tried to figure out what percentage of an increase that was, but I realized I'm just a little too stupid. Does someone else do it, please? Thank you. Kayla, when you and I were born, stamps were 33 cents. In 25 years, the cost has doubled. Between 2009 and today, just 14 years, can't even drive yet. 14 years old maybe has a permit. The cost of a stamp to ship to Canada or Mexico has doubled. In 2007, you could send mail to Canada for just 60 – or Mexico, both of them, for just 69 cents. Haha, nice. Just six cents more.
KAYLA: It’s a 36% increase.
SARAH: Okay. Thank you
KAYLA: I didn't do the math. I typed in Google, what is it, and then it told me.
SARAH: Thank you. Anyway, you interrupted my flow.
KAYLA: So sorry.
SARAH: In 2007, you could send mail to Canada or Mexico for just 69 cents
KAYLA: Nice
SARAH: Yeah I know. Which is only six cents more than it now costs to send mail domestically.
And then I was looking even further back and I was like, wow, why were stamps six cents in 1863 and in 1885 they were only two? And then I realized that trains and also civil war. But the crazy thing is that even despite some pretty big wars, the cost of a stamp didn't exceed six cents until 1971, a time during which my parents were alive. Now, the late 70s is when the price really started moving exponentially, which is interesting because that is also around the same time that we switched from surface mail to airmail for all first class mail. The planes fucked us. But then, you know what I learned? When adjusted for inflation, the cost of stamps has remained relatively stable ish. So the planes in particular didn't necessarily fuck us. There was just a lot of inflation in that time. It was called the Great Inflation. And it turns out correlation is not causation. And JJ the jet plane doesn't need to go into hiding yet. On February 19th, 1914, a five year old child named Charlotte May Peerstorf was mailed through the USPS to her grandparents house because it was cheaper than a train ticket. Actually wasn't the USPS at that point, but it was the United States, the Postal Service, what it was called at that point. She was fine. But after that, they changed the rules to prohibit the shipment of humans. In conclusion, inflation is bad. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
KAYLA: Wow.
SARAH: Didn't you learn a lot?
KAYLA: I mean, I did. Yeah.
SARAH: You can tell us about your beefier, juicier thoughts on inflation on our social media @Soundsfakepod We also have a Patreon.
KAYLA: We should get a Stamps.com sponsorship after that to be honest.
SARAH: Just for that. Truly.
KAYLA: For real.
(50:00)
SARAH: We don't really mail stuff, but still.
KAYLA: We could. We have a P.O. Box.
SARAH: True.
KAYLA: People can mail stuff.
SARAH: Yeah. How come no one's mailed me things recently? It's probably because the cost of Stamps is prohibitive. Prohibitive.
KAYLA: Yep.
SARAH: For those at home, I just took a little glug of my cherry coke.
KAYLA: She had to take a break.
SARAH: If you want to support us for some reason on Patreon, Patreon.com/SoundsFakePod is the place to do that. We have a new $2 patron. It's Jackie. Thanks, Jackie.
KAYLA: Hello.
SARAH: Our $5 patrons who we're promoting this week are Ashley W, Asritha Vinnakota, Bookmarvel, Brandon Smith, and Brooke Siegel. Our $10 patrons who are promoting something this week are CinnamonToastPunch, who would like to promote rainy day walks with friends and splashing in puddles. David Jay, who would like to promote emergency strategy by Adrienne Marie Brown. David Nurse, who would like to promote (shrugging sound) Derek and Karissa, who would like to promote manifesting that all high school seniors get into the college they desire. Is Karissa a senior?
KAYLA: Elderly.
SARAH: Oh my god. I hope you get into the college you want.
KAYLA: I agree.
SARAH: And Elle Bitter, who would like to promote normalizing the use of tone indicators. Slash srs.
KAYLA: No. Oh, okay.
SARAH: Slash no. No, but then that would undercut.
KAYLA: That's true.
SARAH: Slash yes.
KAYLA: Slash yes.
SARAH: Our other $10 patrons are JB, My Aunt Jeannie, Maggie Capalbo, Martin Chiesl, Mattie, Nathan Lisch, Potater, PurpleHayes, Rosie Costello, Barefoot Backpacker, SongofStorm, The Steve, Zirklteo, Arcnes, Alyson, Ari K., Benjamin Ybarra and Cass.
Our $15 patrons are Andrew Hillumm, who would like to promote the Invisible Spectrum podcast, Click4Caroline, who would like to promote Ace of Hearts, Dia Chappell, who would like to promote Twitch.tv/Melody Dia. Hector Murillo, who would like to support friends that are supportive, constructive, and help you grow as a better person. Hector would like to promote that, but also support. John Young, who would like to, you know, maybe I should just message you again, because it's been like two months and neither of us has really put in the effort necessary.
KAYLA: At least it's mutual, you know.
SARAH: Keziah Root who would like to promote people who come into your life just for a small time, but right when you need them. Like John Young, who hasn't told us what he wants to promote. I guess I don't know your pronouns. I shouldn't be stereotypical. Nathaniel White, who would like to promote Nathanieljwhitedesigns.com.
KAYLA: Can we just please take a second for Nathaniel J. White, because again, when I was listening to episode 70, it was like his third episode being a patron or something.
SARAH: Nathaniel, do you realize you're still a patron?
KAYLA: Maybe Nathaniel's not and we need to like re-look at who's a patron. Either way.
SARAH: Either way.
KAYLA: What a fucking guy.
SARAH: What a homie.
KAYLA: Nathaniel White and Jennifer Smart.
SARAH: Jennifer Smart.
KAYLA: Holy shit. Down. Arcnes too. Is Arcnes still a patron?
SARAH: Yeah, Arcnes is still a patron. Also Arcnes.
KAYLA: Holding it down since like at least episode 70. Insane. Also Asritha actually.
SARAH: Also Asritha.
KAYLA: Asritha's given us a lot of her money. You have to stop.
SARAH: Kayla's Aunt Nina, who would like to promote KateMaggartArt.com. Sara Jones, who's @eternalloli everywhere. The other day, I looked at someone who had been a patron for a long time. They adjusted their thing and it showed their lifetime, like how much they'd given to us and I was like, oh my god, stop. Sabrina – No, Sara Jones, who's @eternalloli everywhere. Our 20 dollar patrons are Sabrina Hauckk, who would like to say Merry Christmas, who would
like to say Happy New Year, who would like to say (sighs) And Dragonfly, who would like to promote… What's your favorite fan fiction?
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Thanks for listening. Tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears and, at that point, the cost of the postage stamp will be increased to 63 cents.
KAYLA: Okay. Until then, take good care of your cows and do not send them in the mail. It's not allowed and it's too expensive.
SARAH: Yeah, you can't send cows in the mail. You can send live bees through the mail and you can send day-old poultry.
KAYLA: You can absolutely send live bugs. I've seen people do it.
SARAH: I'm basing this off of Wikipedia. A bee is a bug.
KAYLA: Yep.
SARAH: I don't think you can send a whole hive. I think you can only send queens.
KAYLA: That makes sense.
SARAH: Imagine shipping a hive of 40,000 bees.
KAYLA: That would be pretty dangerous.
SARAH: But you can just buy a little queen online.
KAYLA: Mhm
SARAH: Anyway...
KAYLA: Bye.
SARAH: Your cow… I was going to say something about the cows. Tell them to buy their postage… Oh no, it'll be too late. It'll already be up at 10. Ugh. Gotta end it. Gotta end it here.
KAYLA: Okay Goodbye.
(55:26)